The Rescue Metamorph

Oh the tears from the child as her dolls hair is caught in the spindle
Her little face awash as she tries to rescue it 
The little rag doll, her only friend was whisked away so fast so cruel
The spinning wheel stops to her delight, her tears dry and a smile returns as her
doll is eased out of the spun thread on the spindle. 
 The time it took seemed as long as the sands dropping through the hour glass on her grandmas table, timing the spinning thread as she teases the wool apart, then spinning the spindle to collect the spun yarn, but the rescue is complete, the doll returned unharmed, the child restored to good humour, as grandma frowns a little as the last grains drops into the glass before it is turned to start again, Her money will be short but her granddaughter is happy so therefore is grandma.



The Rescue Metamorph from free verse to rhyme 

The squeal from the wheel as the knitted hair is caught within
Horror strikes at the child and tears course down her chin
A rag doll her only friend caught in grandma’s spinning wheel
Pulled from her arms, but tugging at her heart she can feel

Grandma stops teasing wool, the wheel she stops spinning
Her granddaughter’s tears have her own eyes full to brimming
The sands of time through the glass dripping their next meal away
But grandma rescues the doll so her granddaughter can play
© 5/04/2013 ~GG~

Contest Entry.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013



Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 5/1/2013 6:00:00 PM
Mandy, Congratulations :-) In Debbie's "Metamorph" contest. always~ PD
Login to Reply
Date: 4/29/2013 1:53:00 PM
Congrats on your great winning work..Sara
Login to Reply
Date: 4/27/2013 1:49:00 AM
Thank you Mandy for your kind words on my poem.This was an interesting contest congrats on your win therein.Rgds Brian
Login to Reply
Date: 4/26/2013 12:14:00 AM
Congrats on your win... Well done~A.O
Login to Reply
Date: 4/25/2013 6:52:00 PM
Really an interesting story Mandy love them both :D congrats on your big win :D wishing you a lovely day there :D hug, Yanny
Login to Reply
Date: 4/25/2013 4:20:00 PM
This is so good Mandy, I have to admit I am definately drawn to the free verse although the rhyme is very well written.
Login to Reply
Date: 4/25/2013 3:39:00 PM
What a story I just loved it. #1 is Prose Poetry Goldie, and #2 is polished to perfection. Congrad's on your win. Light & Love
Login to Reply
Date: 4/25/2013 11:46:00 AM
congrats on a fine win Mandy....
Login to Reply
Date: 4/25/2013 9:39:00 AM
Oh a deserved winner here Mandy, not that i'm surprised,, just happy to see debbie also agrees...
Login to Reply
Date: 4/8/2013 10:49:00 PM
my dearest golden angel... how are you ? enjoyed so very much your beautiful poem <3 much lov and hugs <3 Sk
Login to Reply
Date: 4/7/2013 2:22:00 PM
Mandy back for a re-read, haven't seen you in ages are you ok?....David
Login to Reply
Date: 4/7/2013 10:00:00 AM
Yup yup..I liked the rewrite too, I hope you enjoyed doing it, it sure seems so! Light & Love
Login to Reply
Date: 4/7/2013 8:51:00 AM
I am with Harry on this one. I loved the first one. I don't even recall that i saw this one before. Yet you did a wonderful job with the rhyming version as well. I liked the succinctness of the rhymed part and yet the fullness of the experience was better portrayed by the prose part. this is a very good entry for Deb's contest, Mandy! (and my favorite among those spindle poems I was seeing for some other contest).
Login to Reply
Date: 4/6/2013 10:23:00 AM
I love the free verse of this wonder, yet your prowess of being the Royal Rhymester of soup shows through here, and yes the result is truly awesome....
Login to Reply
Date: 4/5/2013 4:53:00 PM
Great work..Reads like winning material to me..Thanks for stopping by...It rained really hard Wednesday night and turned back cold here but the spring plants are still blooming and the pollen is super bad right now but winter is past..Sara
Login to Reply
Date: 4/5/2013 1:44:00 PM
HA...I just realized what I wrote is half french and half spanish...told you it wasn't the best...hehe. Classic!
Login to Reply
Date: 4/5/2013 1:41:00 PM
Perfect for the contest, Mandy...good ole Grammy saves the day! Je suis bienvenido a tu casa, aussi?...ha...ok, my french isn't the best.
Login to Reply
Date: 4/5/2013 12:58:00 PM
Mandy that is really clever, well done...David
Login to Reply
Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
Date: 4/5/2013 1:11:00 PM
Thanks David xx
Date: 4/5/2013 12:07:00 PM
This is really great how you changed your free verse to rhyme-- either way, they are a joy to read and made me think how great to have a grandmom like that-- glad to know that you are doing well dear Mandy :)! Believe it or not, I have never seen a real, live mole in my life... ;)
Login to Reply
Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
Date: 4/5/2013 1:09:00 PM
ha we used to catch them as kids, lovely velvet skins but we stopped when the mole catcher came and used to hang them on the fence to prove how many he had killed xx
Date: 4/5/2013 10:05:00 AM
Dear Sis, This is Awesome, I have to look into the Contest. Not that I have much of a chance after reading this Winner. Congratulations. I LOVE YOU ALWAYS and FOREVER YOUR LOVING Brother...Harry
Login to Reply
Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
Date: 4/5/2013 1:08:00 PM
Bless you bro xx
Date: 4/5/2013 6:43:00 AM
Wow, this is an incredible transformation my friend! You have written a dynamic and wondrous poem Mandy! I am enthralled by the splendor of this harmonious piece, what a masterful change from the first poem to the second! I think I like the second one better, I loved reading it this morning! Great Work!!
Login to Reply
Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
Date: 4/5/2013 1:08:00 PM
Thank you Russell, much appreciated xx
Date: 4/5/2013 6:25:00 AM
wow Mandy that's great, Not sure which I prefer...Seren
Login to Reply
Tams The Golden Girl Avatar
Mandy Tams The Golden Girl
Date: 4/5/2013 1:07:00 PM
Thanks Sass xx
Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetics
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter