Notes About The Poem
October is the Domestic Violence awareness month ~ so this poem is for those who are silenced ~ and have survived or are still enduring any form of abuse ~
This poem is not my story ~ it is for all the strong warriors...
The Narcissistic Nightshade
If grief is a ghostwriter,
why is my ink still bleeding,
why is poetry the elixir ~
against trust
weaponized?
O hunter’s moon,
I am not the hunted huntress.
I am the rose armor adorned
with wine-magic wishes ~
a funeral leaf ~ still breathing,
no longer nailed
to the copper casket
of scarlet-scarred season,
refusing to remember
the thorn-hearted scent
within forlorn flowers,
ruthlessly ravaged,
for my withered essence
was never the weakness
draped in hostile dews
of his deceitful dusk,
nor am I the woman
that cowardly wore
the widowed cold needles
of a narcissistic nightshade.
He named it love ~ he promised forever.
I know now what it was:
fangs of fire,
control camouflaged
as commitment christened,
abuse termed as deep affection.
I tasted the malicious marks
of his deadly devotion,
fingerprints of wrath
pressed into the pulse of petals,
my skin scorching
with fixated fault lines
disguised as dedication,
contoured and concealed
with colors of misplaced loyalty…
I am not what his tongue cursed ~
the devil’s belladonna,
but the mistress of hushed violence,
silenced and stone-eyed,
turning trauma
into tulips of troubled twilight.
I forgive and dream
amidst the dusted dahlias,
designing destiny
through ashes and truth
of beautiful brutality ~
the torture that confused
the charisma of a self-loathing psyche,
while pansies pine with death,
screaming sweet-smelling cruelty,
like the healing hues of hibiscus
floating in the air,
free from Lucifer’s sun
that burned the roots
of a garden bleeding garnet gravel ~
forsaking the sadistic pollens
that smothered my soul’s blooms.
I survived ~ I thrived ~
I live
to sow seeds
of lilies and light,
and I w a n e ~
a divorcee of darkness,
an angel without crippled wings...
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