The Hubbard Was Bare
Old mother Hubbard got locked in her cupboard
But not just the cupboard was bare
She let out a yelp but nobody could help
Because there was nobody there
She’d make this assertion, there was no perversion
She never considered it rude
She just liked to feel the cool air on her skin
And would walk round her house in the nude
But she would be certain to close every curtain
For these days she wasn’t too thin
That day she was daring and had a good airing
Out back with a book and a gin
Her hedges were high so that no prying eye
was likely to get a good eye full
She wasn’t afeared of anyone weird
With a video cam or a rifle
She’d chosen to lie facing up to the sky
In all of her stark naked glory
But then she felt rotten because she’d forgotten
The people up on the next storey
She flashed them a grin and she swigged down her gin
And she frowned for the glass was now dry
With all her bare skin she went wobbling in
When the kids up stairs started to cry
So old mother Hubbard went into her cupboard
To get some more gin and some tonic
But then she was shocked when the cupboard door locked
She found that a little ironic
****
Her first ‘would be’ lover she came to discover
Was shy so he kept it platonic
Dragged into this cupboard by young Hetty Hubbard
His nerves made him slightly moronic
So Anthony Grace didn’t get to first base
Although she was willing and ready
A quick nervous kiss on the side of her face
And then he ran home to his teddy
****
But many years on and three weeks in this cupboard
She just didn’t care anymore
No food to survive, the gin kept her alive
And her kilograms went through the floor
When the door opened wide and a man stood outside
He said Hi, my name’s fireman Grace
Old Mother Hubbard, stood bare in that cupboard
Said Hey, I remember your face
Then Anthony Grace said I’ve been to this place
With a girl who was perfect for me
He said that I too can remember your face
Then he reached for his skeleton key
I never knew why I was always so shy
But hey, I’m not shy any more
He gave her a wink and a grin that was wry,
Stepped inside and then locked the door
**Epilogue**
He looked in her eye and she let out a sigh
And he sure wasn’t shy any more
She said there is something I so want to do
But first could you unlock the door
I’ve dreamt of this moment for many a year
I’m so glad to be here with you
But we’ll have to wait a bit longer my dear
I’m gasping to go to the loo
Copyright © Terry Flood | Year Posted 2022
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