Get Your Premium Membership

The Haunted House

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Connie Marcum Wong.


The Haunted House An aging Victorian graphite three story house sat on a promontory, lonely, deserted, weathered and forlorn. Broken windows showed signs of cruel abuse from passersby amused by throwing rocks we surmised. This skeletal shell of a one-time elegant beauty became a welcome refuge for my sister and I, wet and chilled to the bone on that stormy autumn night. Our car had broken down about two miles away. There were no other homes or buildings nearby. To our amazement the door was open and after knocking loudly with no answer, we let ourselves in. Cobwebs clung to our faces and hair as we entered and brushed them away squeeling disdainfully. I had a small torch on my keychain and with it we looked around to try to find something to dry ourselves off. We moved in unison across the creaking floor, shivering. It was then that I felt cold fingers grasp my shoulder. Wide eyed I slowly turned my head but no one was there. We both heard errie laughter as chills ran down our spines. We ran to the door but now it was locked and we were trapped inside as panic set in with our hearts pounding. Then all of a sudden two creatures appeared before us standing there with matted hair and we both screamed so loudly we scared each other, but with my little light I could see we were looking at ourselves in a full length dusty antique mirror. We laughed hysterically in pure relief. I tried my cell phone again and miraculously got a signal. I managed to contact the auto club who estimated 2 hours. We waited impatiently until the auto club came to rescue us and our car. The driver sat outside and honked his horn. We screamed to him that we were trapped inside. He came up to the front door and to our shock the door flew open. We hurridly left that haunted house and never looked back as the driver quickly drove away in the pouring rain. 8-27-18 Sponsor-   Dear Heart Contest-   The Haunted House

Copyright © | Year Posted 2018




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 10/27/2018 2:26:00 AM
I am very late Connie, much belated congratulations on your win. This is such a wonderful tale indeed. Your words bring the reader right into the heart of your tale. The chills build with such strong imagery. This was deserving of a first place indeed. I do love a well told spooky story and this did fit the bill nicely. Have a wonderful Saturday. Hugs....Mike. XX. A fave.
Login to Reply
Marcum Wong Avatar
Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 10/27/2018 2:00:00 PM
I so appreciate your fave on this haughting story as I very rarely write anything spooky. Have a happy Halloween Mike! Thank you my friend! : )
Date: 9/16/2018 7:54:00 PM
I'm a little late, Connie, great story and a big congratulations on your win. Hugs Eve~`*
Login to Reply
Date: 9/5/2018 11:07:00 AM
Connie, congratulations on your win in my contest with this wonderfully penned and creepy write, wow what a storyteller you are ! Well done !
Login to Reply
Marcum Wong Avatar
Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 9/5/2018 1:14:00 PM
Thank you very much Constance. I think this may be the only scary thing I have ever written, so I really appreciate you giving me a first place win. : )
Date: 9/2/2018 6:35:00 PM
I am SO happy for you getting a number one placement in the contest. Hurrah!!! And congratulations.
Login to Reply
Marcum Wong Avatar
Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 9/2/2018 6:48:00 PM
I appreciate that Andrea because I never write any thing that has horror in it. I was thrilled with the first placement. I am happy we both ended up with a top win! Thank you my friend! : ) xxoo
Date: 9/2/2018 5:33:00 AM
Hi Connie! This is an interesting write. I like the classical horror theme which goes with a nice rhythm from top to bottom. But somehow I think there's a twist in the end - The driver is a ghost because the door opens as he comes up to the front door; (conti...)
Login to Reply
Date: 9/2/2018 5:32:00 AM
means he would have been controlling the door. So you both sisters have got out of the haunted house but still going with a haunted person, better check his vehicle's mirror; you may find his real scary face. Ha! Ha!..... just my thinking. Nice work. Congratulation for the 1st place.
Login to Reply
Date: 9/1/2018 12:18:00 PM
Awesome write, Connie! Very descriptive and a great story. Congrats in your win...Charlie
Login to Reply
Date: 9/1/2018 9:43:00 AM
A very good narrative, Connie. Glad you inserted a moment of humour to make up for the chilling effects. Regards // paul
Login to Reply
Date: 8/31/2018 7:00:00 PM
wow, Connie, this is GREAT descriptive story telling. i love the part when they saw themselves as scary creatures. This better win. It is DANG good.
Login to Reply
Marcum Wong Avatar
Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 8/31/2018 7:44:00 PM
Thank you for your encouraging support Andrea. Fingers crossed. : )
Date: 8/31/2018 10:54:00 AM
Scary good Connie, best wishes...
Login to Reply
Date: 8/31/2018 10:04:00 AM
Love this one, Connie - great story here
Login to Reply
Date: 8/30/2018 12:18:00 PM
Well done; it should be a contest winner, so good luck!
Login to Reply
Date: 8/29/2018 3:27:00 PM
A beautifully written piece my dear friend. As always your poetry is a joy to read, even if a scary tale... A fav...
Login to Reply
Marcum Wong Avatar
Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 8/29/2018 4:15:00 PM
Thank you dear Robert. I really adored your collaboration. Blessings, Connie ; ) xxoo
Date: 8/28/2018 9:56:00 PM
Your poem is wonderfully eerie, Connie, and well expressed through your chilling story-telling.. I especially loved the 'mirror moments' - haunted humor at its scary best. Excellent and enjoyed my lovely friend.. Best wishes for a win! ~Susan
Login to Reply
Ashley Avatar
Susan Ashley
Date: 8/29/2018 11:45:00 AM
Indeed, my friend - I'm glad you and your sister could laugh about.. I giggled in relief for you as well when I read the last line of the stanza.. lol! :))
Marcum Wong Avatar
Connie Marcum Wong
Date: 8/28/2018 11:30:00 PM
Have you ever been scared of your own reflection in the mirror when it is dark and you are somewhere not familiar? It is easy to do, especially if you are in a haunted house. : ) Thank you Susan. xxoo
Date: 8/28/2018 7:13:00 PM
Wonderful story and well written. Could feel that chill down my spine. love phyl
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 3:00:00 PM
connie, ohh i like the contemporary feel of this hauntingly engaging tale...you got the scare of seeing yourself!... well done!..huggs
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 2:14:00 PM
wonderfully told, connie! i love the part about looking in the mirror. best of luck in the contest...
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 1:02:00 PM
What great storytelling Connie!!! You really got me with the mirror as I really did not know where it was going. Well done xxoo
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 11:25:00 AM
nice spooky story, Connie; I enjoyed it!
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 8:00:00 AM
This was great Connie. Very spooky and I could feel those cold shivers as I read. Thank goodness for the auto club. : )
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 7:35:00 AM
what a spooky story Connie and I loved the humour with the mirror, very good luck in the contest:-) hugs Jan xx
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 6:54:00 AM
Reads like a spooky story..the haunted house did all kinds of tricks..but the best was it made you a ghost.. even if for a brief moment. Best for a win, Connie.
Login to Reply
Date: 8/28/2018 4:24:00 AM
As I suspected your narratives are as delightful as your poems, Connie.
Login to Reply

Book: Reflection on the Important Things