The Hand I'Ve Been Dealt

I close my eyes and travel to places I want to go
Imagining the details, eyerything I can see
I listen to the noises, of birds, the wind or creaks
Animals walking through the woods
Waves crashing on the shores
I think of things I did, So many years ago,
Before my illness changed me
Like a thief the things it stole.

One thing it cannot have 
Are the memories in my head
The pains that it has caused me 
Are close to being dead
Nerve pain is unimaginable to ever try explain
Unless another suffers nothing is the same
Its taken all my vigor, my vit and my vim
So many times all that's left are to close my eyes and dream

Chronic pain is something most people suffer alone
Our friendships and relationships are done mostly on the phone
No one wants to hear excuses all the time 
For why I'm stuck in bed, and cannot meet and roam
To places that I used to go to spend along with friends
Have now become old memories no one can depend

If I could change one thing in life it would be not to be
The person whose always sick and tired 
That person isn't me.
The me I want to be is the one that used to run
Off on a whim to anywhere to anything that was fun

So pray for me is all I ask and maybe once in a while 
Think of me and how I was and I hope that you will smile
My illness does not define the person that I am
Just because I'm down today
Does not mean forever 
Tomorrow is another chance that I will try some more
To regain all I used to be and will become again
This game is not over until I throw in the towel.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

Poem

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Hunter Avatar
July 29, 2014 at 10:15 AM
Hi Jennifer. I hate to hear of your pain...healing thoughts coming your way. The poem is excellent, by the way. Hang in there, gal. A friend of mine who lives in pain from cancer and treatment told me once when I asked him about it..."ahhh, pain...ya can't fight it, but you can dance with."
Sister Avatar
September 11, 2014 at 9:13 AM
Glad you've got my back, j
Hunter Avatar
July 29, 2014 at 10:16 AM
it
Christensen Avatar
July 22, 2014 at 3:43 AM
Your poem really captured me. I can relate to a lot of the things you mention. From how you experience pain to thinking about just giving up..... Whatever plagues you is not you, I have that written in my wallet.....:) , so I see it every day. Great poem! And I wish you the very best!
Sister Avatar
September 11, 2014 at 9:15 AM
Thank you for feeling it with me. Its hard to get others to see. J
Street Avatar
July 22, 2014 at 12:33 AM
It Truly Isn't A Game This Life. Merely A Footnote In What Once Was: As Also That Rugged Cross To A Weary Child....KLove *
Sister Avatar
September 11, 2014 at 9:18 AM
Support
Sister Avatar
September 11, 2014 at 9:17 AM
Thank you Jeremy, I appreciate the suppoer. J
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