The Fickle One

*Note: This was made on July 2nd. I honestly forgot I wrote it. It was mostly written in incoherent scribbles. AND NOW IT'S A MASTERPIECE. Just kidding. It's....uh... a fickle drizzle of thought let's just say. ;) --------------- Ideas...ideas.... Trying to find a certain balance of genius Within this tired dollop of foolishness... Craving excitement....messy...indulgent words... I never knew the difficulty would rise so substantially under such little pressure You don't see me, do you..? I'm not so good at these damn writes, about you... When I look out of the window of a car, Sometimes I get lost in myself I feel so pensive...often, very sad... Like I'm in a movie, and I am missing someone, or something Almost as if I am lost in the death of a loved one But it's not usually someone in particular Other times it is... I think about his side of earth... Yeah, him... It gets crazy in my head from there.. I guess I harbor bitter toward people that will never feel the same way Though I harbor bitterness from seemingly nowhere sometimes My thoughts often go back to the majority of people And how fickle we are It's a little bit depressing but, More annoying I suppose I am strange... There could be opportunities that I don't even see I guess you can call it blindness I don't know...I guess the first step of getting rid of the blindness Is acknowledging the fact that you are blind... Sometimes the darkness of not knowing is rather comforting... Maybe I'm just writing from my ass, but who cares? Laughter...I've done a lot of that lately I guess it's difficult to get back to that groove, at least for me I'm so emotional, it hurts I sometimes wish I was more grounded...more realistic I never ask for normality Because I don't think that there's anybody who knows exactly what that means Whatever though; that's not really significant, is it? What is important though? I'm not sure anymore Maybe I do know; I just don't acknowledge it enough I am better than that, aren't I? I'm just so lost in myself.. I know I am better than this... But who cares about me? Shut up already! Gain some perspective for once! The bottom line is, I need to learn to love myself Otherwise, I'll become the fickle one.