The Body Pillow
I have trouble sleeping,
Yes, that's true,
No matter how many blankets heaping,
They all wind up on the floor,
Yes, that's makin' me blue,
And I don't wanna' stay up no more....
So I went on line,
To some South American place,
They ship goodies oh so fine,
Imagine, from the Amazon River!!!
And they usually come on time
Yes, it's true,
I wouldn't lie to you....
So I ordered this big body pillow,
Bigger than you or me,
And an expensive satin cover,
Oh, what luxury, you see?
I got it yesterday,
Yes, it's true,
The damn thing took up
The entire bed!!
What was I to do??
The two of us can't fit,
I was kind'a feelin' sh__,
Another Tom Bell Dumbbell idea,
What'll I cook up next?
I feel like Ralph Kramden,
Foiled at every turn....
So I took the pillow outside,
Lit it up, and let it burn...
At least I got a little heat,
Out of this dumbbell feat....
What'll I do next?
Why, do I have a hex?
Maybe if I try to do something real dumb,
It'll turn out a brilliant thing...
But, then again, with my luck,
I'll wind up in Sing-Sing.
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