The Ballad of Villonia Beebe, a Life In Three Parts: Part 2

The Middle Years She'd been wooed by dukes and diplomats From Nome to Nagasaki, Kept by mobsters, bishops, bureaucrats, And a movie mogul's lackey. She'd been plied with jewels, a fancy car, Designer gowns and furs By lots and lots of husbands, Not one of whom was hers. For fifteen years she lived among the swank, But at thirty she had nothing in the bank. She pawned her diamonds, sold her gowns and her furs, The car was repossessed 'cause just the payments were hers, Got her picture in the tabloids with some slanders and slurs, Villonia Beebe was no one's baby anymore. She took to pandering and cruising in malls. A john, a judge, would like to help her, but he hadn't the balls. She learned it's hard to be a call girl when nobody calls, Villonia Beebe was no one's baby anymore. Two more years went by in bars and walking the streets. She'd like to meet a handsome guy who's loaded and sweet, So she could settle down and turn that trick into a treat, And then she'd be somebody's baby once more. At thirty-two she thought she should get out of "the life", Go back home to Arkansas and be someone's wife. She'd soon get back an accent you could cut with a knife And become a real hillbilly once more. The Toad Suck men were simple and quite easy to please, Though the way they buzzed around her made their wives ill at ease. Still, she made a decent living on her back and her knees, Villonia Beebe'd come full circle for sure. Then one night she met Homer, at a barn dance, of course, A cute and awkward guy who said his nickname was "Horse". One ride and she's not had one single day of remorse, ViIllonia Beebe was someone's baby once more. She sometimes contemplates her life, When she takes the time to bother, From beauty queen to trampoline, From doll to moll to mother. She doesn't miss the jewels or car at all, And fur just makes her itch, But if truth be told, a part of her Sort of misses being rich. But Villonia is content now with her lot, Especially when her "Horse" is hot to trot.