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The Agony and the Eggs I See

aint no big fan of eggs,
scrambled, well, okay
just like the yellow part,
that's all that I can say...

we go back many a year,
my egg friends and dear old me
there's reasons for my ambivalence,
as you will shortly see

one day, a young girl on a visit
to my very humble abode...
decided we should scramble eggs,
but this is what I was told...

don't let that "belly button" 
get into the mixing bowl,
I looked at her quite puzzled,
at what I'd just been told...

that yucky umbilical cord..
that placenta like part,
which did truely look so "ick"!!!
the thought of it from then on,
astounded me,
it really made me sick

so from then on,
whenever I would scamble,
those eggs, now a chore,
removing that elusive membrane
was a neccessity once more

I had some other reasons
for eggs to be memorable for me
like halloween raw egg stunts,
throwing at others,
and, oh my, if you could only see,

I threw one at another group of schmucks
so stupid there were no ducks,
and hit one in the head
from a block, quite far away,
I am quite amazed how I did it,
even to this day...

and one time was pretty scary,
as we chucked one at a door
the maniac inside
charging out at us almost before
thank God he didn't catch us,
or this poem would not be here
he would have killed us if he could
or at least spanked our stupid rear..

there are other tales to tell
of eggs and dumb old me,
maybe in the future,
we'll just have to wait and see.

Copyright © Tom Bell | Year Posted 2007

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