The 2am Sadness

She said, “Joy, no more tears.” And I said OK. But that was before I considered, that I’d be up at random hours of the night, reliving the heartbreak he caused. That was before the 2 a.m.’s found me and the tears illegally fell. That was before the rage set in, and I felt trapped in this hell. That was before I realized, I no longer had him to call, I no longer had him at all. I no longer had him as the one to make it right, to make me laugh from his jokes, to randomly text about random things, to which he’d promptly respond, because he loved me you see. Instead I’m stuck in this reality that no longer includes him. “No tears.” “OK” A premature promise.