Ten Days Till Christmas

TEN DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS

Ten days till Christmas
Ten days of worry    hustle
What shall I get her?

She won’t help me out
Won’t even give me a clue
What’s a man to do?

She never complains
About my Christmas presents
No    just this blank look

Makes me feel so small
Makes her feel she has revenge
A poke in the gut

“You never listen!”
These are some of her complaints
“You leave the seat up!

Don’t care how I dress
Might as well wear an old sack
Just like some old hag”

I can’t help but laugh
Because her description fits
OW!    OUCH!    That did it!

I will pay dearly
That laugh has ruined her Yule
Ten days of silence

Ten days on the couch
Eating out at McDonald’s
By myself    outcast

HALLELUIAH!
Thanks    Lord    ten wonderful days
HALLELUIAH!
……………………………………………….

This is not a description of my married life. I’m just having fun. This is more of a Major Hoople 
poem – “Egad, Martha!  Awpf  Sputt!”
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

Poem

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December 31, 2010 at 9:40 AM
Very descriptive piece. I like the humorous approach. The reader can't help but chuckle at the end. Glad to say my marriage isn't that way. Keep your creative pen flowing. Thank you for your kind words on my poem. Happy New Year! Karen
K. Avatar
December 19, 2010 at 8:13 AM
ahahahaha-- very nice way of ending this! Really made me chuckle but I'm happy that this is not about your married life, Dave :) enjoyed this very cute write :D -- nikko :)
Dietrich Avatar
December 18, 2010 at 3:21 PM
hahaha, the last part was a great tie up for this!! I sure hope it's not your real life situation.... or is it?? hahaha. LUv, Andrea
Johnson Avatar
December 18, 2010 at 12:59 PM
Anyone who can joke like this about marriage, undoubtedly has a great one. Merry Christmas. Love, Joyce
Guzzi Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 4:57 PM
awww MEN...it is a FUNNY write though..happy holy days! Light & Love
Kendrick Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 3:54 PM
Good one ...Got a chuckle..Just get a mutual agreement..We don't buy each other gifts..You get what you want and I will get what I want..Would that hound dog hunt?Enjoyed..Thanks for stopping by my work..Your comments lightened my load and made my evening lighter..Sara
Richards Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 12:35 PM
OMG>....you are too much!! Did my husband conspire with you to write this poem!!??????
Devonshire Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 12:11 PM
If a man is not listening, he probably can't pick up on the gift hints his lady is dropping, Dave. When in doubt, think jewelry -- always a hit! Very funny poem, my friend, and I'm glad you're not spending 10 days on the couch (even though Major Hoople might prefer to be an outcast)! Merry Christmas, dear friend. Love, Carolyn
Coulstock Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 9:43 AM
Now,now,Daver,eating out at McDonalds for 10 days!very unhealthy.Like this, good joke on us women.Probably true though in some households.My husband used to have a retreat,the shed at the bottom of the garden.That is until a tree from next door fell on it and the roof crashed in.He wasn't in it at the time thank goodness!Has your wife seen this?Mind you,you seem like a fun kind of person and a sense of humour is a good attribute for a happy marriage.I enjoyed reading this,thank you.Love June
Peranteau Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 9:33 AM
I'm not buying the foot note my friend ! *smiles* Thanks fer the smile today ! A great write dear poet ! much love, james
Neels Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 8:43 AM
Dave, I just love this humorous write of yours, smiles all around while reading this, love and blessings for the festive season, Wilma
Mehta Avatar
December 16, 2010 at 7:53 AM
Very humorous write and particularly I enjoyed the end part of the poem, daver
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