Talk Turkey

[This was written for Matt Caliri’s Dialogue contest but withheld because frankly I’m not convinced I can call it a poem… But whatever it is… I kinda like it, so here it is.] ______________ “Psst!” “Who’s there?” “I’m behind this bush.” “Who are you?” “Shush!” “Don’t ‘Shush’ me.” “Someone might hear.” “There’s nobody here.” “No turkey farmer?” “They have farmers in Turkey?” “Not a farmer in Turkey.” “Well, what then?” “A farmer of turkeys.” “Why would you give a damn?” “I’m a turkey.” “You are?” “I am.” “You must think Thanksgiving is the pits.” “Hence the bush.” “You need to go somewhere.” “Somewhere?” “Somewhere with no Thanksgiving.” “Somewhere I could carry on living?” “Yeah; like Britain.” “There’s no Thanksgiving in Britain?” “Nope.” “I’m smitten.” “You’ll have to come out.” “No chance.” “There’s no-one about.” “No turkey farmers?” “Not even a Turkish one?” Aren’t you the funny one… question.” “Ask away.” “You know how to get to Britain?” “You need to get a plane.” “I can fly - a bit.” “It’s five thousand miles.” “When’s the next plane?” “Tonight.” “Tonight?!!!” “That’s right.” “So, this ‘Britain’ has no Thanksgiving?” “Deffo.” “Bliss.” “But it does have Christmas.” “You didn’t see how that might be a consideration?” “I just realised.” “Thanks for nowt.” “There’s no-one about.” “Your point being?” “You’d best come out.” “I’ve got to keep hiding.” “He’ll find you there.” “Like you care.” “You can hide at my place.” “That’s jolly decent of you.” “One does one’s best.” “Where is your place?” “Behind the big wooden box.” “You’re a real pal, you got a name?” “I sure do, it’s Freddy the fox.” “Eek!”