Taking Myself Back To Zero

To humble yourself, I mean, to really take yourself back to zero, open a dictionary but not a student one. I have been doing this lately, to study the words I do not know. I am using a super doper two volume extravaganza of a dictionary, so I am today as humble as I have ever been or shall ever be again. I started listing all the words I did not know, but ended up with sixteen pages in an hour, so I am now listing the words I do know – not the ones I have heard and have no idea how to use - but the ones I am confident actually using, not in everyday speech because that would be irritating and seem silly, but in my writings. When children say there is nothing to do, I wonder what they would say if they could see what I am doing? When they say I am bored I wonder if they would be bored if they were inspired to keep learning? I have no idea why I am inspired to keep learning. It must be intrinsic, because there is a voice within me that compels me to learn these words I was never interested in before this week. It is not the voice of my parents. It is not the voice of my teachers. It is a voice humbled by the knowledge that there is so much I do not know. I sit with a dictionary twice as heavy as a microwave oven full of sausage pies on my lap, lamenting all the days I was sitting around saying how bored I was.