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surface tensions

pour enough shoe polish into a river ~ stepping stones may appear optical illusions yes ~ scratch at the surface find man’s true veneer By David Kavanagh

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Victor Buhagiar

Date: 6/24/2024 2:31:00 AM

Two very clever Monoku.

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/24/2024 12:49:00 PM

Thank you Victor

Ink Empress

Date: 6/22/2024 6:47:00 AM

Dear david, a very deeply poetic way of stating that theres so much more, that floats beneath the surface. So true and wise! Well said and delivered. I like the way youv used nature in a descriptive manner to depict your thoughts. Brilliant Pleasure reading your monoku.

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/22/2024 8:44:00 AM

Heya Ink, you totally get my point here, true reality and indeed the truth itself seems to lurk just beneath the surface, of course some things we try take at face value, but are always open to man’s deception, and need a little further investigation, thanks so much for stopping by, cheers David

Tom Cunningham

Date: 6/18/2024 11:03:00 PM

You may see a lot of gloss on the surface but when you peel off a few layers you'll find plenty of rot. Last week I was at a 70th party at a golf club in Rathfarnham, great night, quite groggy the next day lol. Hope you're keeping well David. Tom

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/19/2024 12:41:00 AM

Heya Tom, Rathfarnham is one of the more picturesque parts of Dublin, with the mountain backdrop not too far away, you were on the good Guinness by the sounds on it lol!, thanks so much for very relevant and wise comment, cheers David

Paul Willason

Date: 6/18/2024 10:54:00 PM

A shallow veneer but unfortunately so convincing to the unwary. This poem shines on its own merits David...got me in and hooked with the first line.

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/19/2024 12:49:00 AM

Thank you Paul, you have a good eye for seeing past shallow veneers, even if they appear convincing on first glance, glad you enjoyed the hook, cheers David

Di11y Da11y

Date: 6/18/2024 12:33:00 PM

oil on water offers a strangely beautiful death blow/reflecting rainbows whilst suffocating all below

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/18/2024 3:33:00 PM

Of course the machine grows the more it’s fed, 10% AI 90% human my highest score so far, yes there will always be the serendipity effect (a one off) so no worries there ;-)

Di11y Da11y
Date: 6/18/2024 3:20:00 PM

I'm convinced at some point I'll write something AI like, I've checked myself a few times and so far I'm human (although maybe checking is feeding the machine lol)

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/18/2024 3:04:00 PM

I’ve often bounced off a comment thread in the past, it’s brilliant when something clicks inside, and a whole poem starts to develop, not sure about AI comments though, something altogether different clicks!

Di11y Da11y
Date: 6/18/2024 1:50:00 PM

Just sharing the imagery that came from your poem + comment thread. Always inspiring :)

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/18/2024 1:31:00 PM

Hey Dilly that line has great potential and sounds much more beautiful than my monoku, you should save it for a proper poem, cheers David

Lin Lane

Date: 6/18/2024 7:16:00 AM

Usually, it's beneath the surface that matters most. Pour shoe polish into a river and you might get arrested for polluting. Now, about your intent... I think one would have to scratch deeper than a person's veneer to see the real person because it's just a covering to his/her true self.

David Kavanagh
Date: 6/18/2024 8:05:00 AM

Heya Lin nothing cryptic in this one, more a word play on river pollution, fish kills have become more commonplace here, seems a few unscrupulous waste disposal companies were illegally dumping chemicals and solvents beside waterways, some of which is used in shoe polish, just thought I’d highlight it in a monoku, cheers David