Suicide Mural Part Two

But it didn't quite work out My lazy eye never worked And I got depressingly overweight I could never be a super model But if I tried just hard enough I might have been a role model But the sad truth is I'm just an out of date model Expired I'm ready for the trash can My life is a tapestry of poor decisions And things one should never do All I'm leaving behind is my regrets And things that will always be secret So I get up and leave this forest And I walk one last time through my gilded cage From buildings reaching the sky To rundown shops in the ghetto I walk the beach and enjoy the view I almost drowned in Chesapeake Bay I got mugged on 19th bay I met my best friend on 18th Bay I told the cops my parents died at sea This is where I was raised I recall it all half dazed Because I yearn to know where the time went How I went from an exuberant youth To a jaded old man so very fast It's a blast as if it happened overnight I suppose I was shackled to everything I wanted to be And never considered what I actually was So I take these words and paint them on walls I climb on rooftops and scream until my lungs hurt But it does little for my miserable heart My world was once full of rainbows But now it's full of blacks and whites I suppose I stop at the pier and peer out at the sea All of these words write themselves in the sky Upon an invisible wall that stands so tall And the stanza stretches into the very clouds And I'm sitting on that wall as high as the clouds And I peer at everything I'm leaving behind With my sullen blue eyes I slowly close my eyes And it all goes blissfully black