Suicide Cafe

And now, a word from our sponsor: Has your sirloin lost its flavor? Do you gag on fish filet? Have you grown a morbid hunger for a terminal buffet? Ok! There’s a menu made to die for down at Suicide Café. You can start with soup and salad topped with Ricin-tainted Cheese. And our Bathtub Gin with Razor lets you end it all with ease. Ice teas? Quench your thirst for something different with our Botulism Breeze. If you’re into dining solo, try our Arsenic Puree. For the avant garde and daring, there’s our Cyanide Soufflé. Ole! For dessert, try going retro with our Hemlock Mint Sorbet. Belladonna Toadstool Nibblers leave you gasping with delight. Our Curare Basted Spare Ribs take your breath with every bite. Time tight? Have our Bang-bang Chicken garnished with a sprig of dynamite. Do you style yourself a connoisseur and bon vivant gourmet Seeking gastronomic climax to a soul-destroying day? Oy vey! Come taste the fix you’re craving down at Suicide Café.