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Squeeze Those Dangly Things

We all wake up every morning To a day like no other before This world is still an experiment With lots of mysteries to explore One that's uppermost on peoples' minds And a question unanswered so far Is how they get the caramel inside A Cadbury's Caramilk bar Or why kamikaze pilots wear helmets They're going to wind up in a crash And how much spit does a person produce Or how long is a hundred yard dash Why don't nose hairs have to be trimmed Is there a name for a male ballerina Can illiterate people eat alphabet soup How many octaves in an ocarina Who was the first person to look at a cow Started squeezing those dangly things Then drank the stuff that came pouring out They must have been real ding-a-lings Did you ever get up and brush your teeth And realized you're wiggling your bum Why toasters toast till it's beyond recognition Stating your name at AA, that's dumb Pretty sure corn oil is made from corn Wonder where baby oil is took Why is it that something you're looking for Is always in the last place you look Well that's it for this mangey old geezer My brain is beginning to ache If you know the answer to any of these Then speak up for goodness sakes © Jack Ellison 2013

Copyright © | Year Posted 2013




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Date: 3/28/2013 1:02:00 PM
Hey, Jack! You're at it again, I see! The title...OH MY! I'm glad it wasn't what I suspected, but it's much funnier!! :) You have such a way with words. I don't know the answer to any single one, so I'll just say...GOOD ONE! Hugs!
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Jack Ellison
Date: 3/28/2013 2:17:00 PM
From someone of your poetic prowess, dear Eileen, I couldn't ask for a greater compliment! I am flying sky high! Thank you a whole big bunch! Great big squeezy hugs, Jack xoxoxox
Date: 3/28/2013 6:10:00 AM
haha...love your sense of humor, Jack!
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Jack Ellison
Date: 3/28/2013 6:25:00 AM
Life's one big hoot! When you reach my age, things that were my passion and so important, no longer are! I'm just cruising along into the sunset!
Date: 3/27/2013 5:39:00 PM
Haha, too funny, Jack. Only you can think of these :) You asked me about my surgery. It's all healed now. I am as good as new, lol. My school semester is almost over - a month left. So I've been busy. I will make time to write and read poetry though. Love ya, Toquyen
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Jack Ellison
Date: 3/27/2013 7:17:00 PM
Yee haw... good as new! That's what i wanted to hear! Much love and happy thoughts, Jack xox
Date: 3/27/2013 9:03:00 AM
lol :) awesome :)
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Jack Ellison
Date: 3/27/2013 9:51:00 AM
Obviously had a bunch of fun with this one! Thanks! Don't be a stranger... love and hugs, Jack xox
Date: 3/27/2013 8:46:00 AM
Wow, this is surely a masterpiece, a grand display of wit my friend! You have delighted me with this awesome poem Jack! I am really impressed with your humor on this one! I enjoyed reading this astounding piece, Great Work!!
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Jack Ellison
Date: 3/27/2013 9:52:00 AM
One of my silly moods... have quite a few of them don't I??? Cheers Russ and have a great day!
Date: 3/27/2013 7:50:00 AM
BRAVO! Truly one of your best! Even my onery dragon is a smiling here... Hubby's still in bed... Giving him a small sleep in... as thanks for helping me shovel all that snow... All but 3 inches is melted away already... Expect most of that to go today... Missouri has a saying... If you don't like the weather... just wait a few minutes... LOL... I wish I could get rid of my sore muscles from shoveling that fast... LOL
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Jack Ellison
Date: 3/27/2013 8:13:00 AM
Why thank you my dear Mrs. Eastman! Let that guy snooze for a bit longer! Us men need our beauty sleep! 50° predicted here today... could this be ******? Don't want to say it out loud! Happy melting... huggeroonies! xoxoxox

Book: Shattered Sighs