Splinters

A crown that is broken cannot be fixed It has to be replaced Changed Because a crown that is broken Cannot be turned into joy So why exactly Do you make me sad You broke my heart repeatedly But My heart isn't yours to break It was supposed to be yours to keep But it seems Even You find that hard And so our family Splintered I could go back and forth On whose fault this is But we all know It's obviously your fault MAN How is it my fault Everything I did I did for the family I was only looking at the bigger picture WOMAN But you abandoned us You acted without care Or better still you never really cared And if you didn't care Why should I I'm not the head of the house So why should I have to Cater for the family You can't blame me For looking out for me you can't really blame me For putting myself first I'm a woman I'm meant to be pampered Not yelled at Not cursed at Not discarded And certainly not beaten Like.... like Like your personal punching bag You can't really blame me For packing my bags And attempting to leave Kids Mommy has to put herself first Your Dad is a monster With human skin on MAN How dare you say that How dare you accuse me Of those horrible things All I've ever done I've done for the good Of the family But I'm the head of the house The HEAD You're supposed to listen to my every word Everything would have been okay If you just listened If you had obeyed everything I've said I never abandoned you I just outgrew you You stopped being exciting You outlived your usefulness I need to look forward Into the horizon And find my next toy YES toy To me Women are nothing but playthings I can have them when I want And use them how I like And yet they still flock to me Leave your children with me They're mine I'll teach them how to survive in this world A weak woman like you had no business Raising children on your own You're either with me Or against me WOMAN You know I once believed you But I didn't want to believe it This animal you've become You weren't the man I knew You've changed The warmth the memories And the love Have all died I'm still a woman I still need warmth And since you didn't give inside So I found it outside I can't look in the face of your kids They remind me of you Anytime you hit me I always found excuses I always believed I was at fault And you still loved me If only I did things right Then maybe you won't hit me Maybe we'll live happily ever after But it was all a lie You were nothing more than an abuser A manipulator Who claimed to love me But your actions show otherwise It was never my fault You were just A monster A monster who Splintered our family THE FIRST BORN You know it funny Seeing you two Go back and forth On who's to blame But you forget I'm the one who suffered the most I was the one Who had no choice But to watch your arguments To watch my father beat my mom I didn't have a choice I had to protect my younger siblings But there was on one to protect me No one to shield me From seeing our family Splinter to pieces You claim you put yourself first But all you did was run And look for sex somewhere else You claim you were the Head of the house Yet the only way you could enforce that Was through violence On me and my siblings While my mom just stood there Watching Like a corpse Or a zombie Doing whatever she was told I've always hated you Both of you. SECOND CHILD You know As the second child I was always the forgotten one The one who was born After the first one I was neither the first Nor the last I held no position In your heart Or your mind When the first is angry I was the one who beared the brunt of it Did you ever care About me The things I liked How I'd turn out to be? I don't think so When both of you Were busy fighting I was hating you Both of you LAST CHILD I was always the kid The one who know nothing The baby of the house I mean What did i know Isn't that what you always thought of me Isn't that what everyone thought of me No one takes me serious No one holds my words To the first two I was always the spoilt child The one who the parents loved the most And to my parents I was the baby The one they never took seriously The one they had no qualms Exchanging me with each other like a pair of socks Does anyone Even understand me Does anyone Even know how i feel Is it even useless To start explaining it All I wanted Was a complete family One I could call my own One I could brag about One I could point to And say in pride THIS IS MY FAMILY