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Spawns Dimness

Written: June 16, 2024 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hope had gray hair and looked downcast, Amid grieving and fears, hope is obscene. At night, just a rocket and fanal were seen, Life disappears into shrouds, leading to a blast. Did the hurling and horrible air have a heart? A single eye read the unformed wonder or boom. He was the one who proved the current loom, The quiddity draws the skies and earth apart. Lord, my petition and argument are both fair, What bears devils successful and me a failure? Revolve their decay if the pair were my jailers, Chervil-lined banks and curbs quiver with new air. My sapient wairua creates an Elixir riddle ban, Hoarding and ignoring nature led to a span.

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Tonye George

Date: 6/22/2024 7:34:00 PM

No one can truly understand the wonder of chaos or why it happens. The intent of the people that carry it and where they have buried their humanity. Regardless, nothing would be fair, but hope is the bridge that holds us. And how you've input questions, both answerable and rhetorical. Maybe there's a hidden piece of puzzle to all the mysteries and a cure. "Lord, my petition and argument are both fair, What bears devils successful and me a failure?" His ability to be constant in evil probably.

Jennifer Proxenos

Date: 6/22/2024 1:58:00 PM

Hi Lasaad my friend, you actually sum up this brilliant poem in the verse 'Lord, my petition and argument are both fair, What bears devils successful and me a failure, Revole their decay if the pair were my jailers, Chervil-lined banks and curbs quiver with new air.' Another awesome write. I agree with Nette below. Blessings, Jennifer.

Heidi Sands

Date: 6/22/2024 5:54:00 AM

Excellent. We'll written I can relate to this :)

Paige Hind

Date: 6/21/2024 3:14:00 PM

Hmmm, very cutting work, very deep musings and metaphors- enjoyed reading your work today :)

Duke Beaufort

Date: 6/21/2024 6:41:00 AM

SP, I can ascribe many different meanings to what you've written. I've tried on different alternatives while reading. "Did the hurling and horrible air have a heart?" Seems like you are suggesting it does not. Was the "single eye" a person (he) or divine entity (He) since a capital letter starts the line? I'm thinking you mean "He" based on the next stanza. In this world of ours, it is difficult to understand what makes a success vs failure....a very profound concept. What is a span? If not a bridge but a lifespan, then it was the lifestyle without a bridge to nature that led to the life failure. You pack a lot of thought into a small space. It astounds me really!!

Paula Goldsmith

Date: 6/18/2024 12:47:00 PM

I enjoyed reading your wonderful "Spawns Dimness" write. Great Ending... Have a great/blessed day writing away............

Sam Kauffman

Date: 6/18/2024 10:51:00 AM

Just wonderful, my friend! Your sonnet so reminds me of the Psalms of Lament written from David's aching heart. Your use of fresh words and beautifully crafted images, "quiddity," "wairua," and "chervil-lined banks" are striking as we travel with you through pain! Love the phrase "did the hurling and horrible air have a heart?" Elegant and eloquent, dear friend. If this is for a contest, I think I'm going to see this poetic artistry on the winners list. Blessings of comfort! Impressive!

Victor Buhagiar

Date: 6/18/2024 1:38:00 AM

Superlative write. Great rhymes and splendid diction. It's a sonnet to remember.

Hilda Greenhough

Date: 6/17/2024 8:01:00 PM

The outstanding rhyme and wording impresses me. The comment on devils reminds me of the apocalypse. Thank you for another great write.

Silent One

Date: 6/17/2024 10:50:00 AM

Hey Sotto, your This sonnet thoughtfully examines the struggle to maintain hope in a world filled with fear and destruction. Through rich imagery and poignant questions, it explores themes of morality, justice, and the search for meaning. The use of personification, metaphors, and cultural references adds depth to the poet's contemplations, making this a profound meditation on the human condition.

Ink Empress

Date: 6/17/2024 6:56:00 AM

What a deep and profound write this is dr sotto! So well woven and delivered with excellent rhymes that flow in sheer eloquence! this made me think and ponder and as always theres a touch of wisdom in your well articulated lines! i must also highlight "What bears devils successful and me a failure? Revolve their decay if the pair were my jailers, Chervil-lined banks and curbs quiver with new air.” soulfully meaningful! So powerful! “My sapient wairua creates an Elixir riddle ban” such sumptuous diction! Pleasure reading this! Sending you light

Nette Onclaud

Date: 6/16/2024 5:44:00 PM

a gripping expression of nature and man's dilemma...well done, sotto!