Some Suspiciously Specious Motherly Advice

Happy National Parents Day (tomorrow, July 24) to all you Poetry Soup moms who are, ever have been, or who would like to be. And with this caveat...be careful what you tell your children. They often tend to be quite liberal with your meaning and quite literal in their interpretations. My mama taught me manners That serve me to this very day, But there's one I never understood Nor could fully quite condone. Mama said: "Don't slurp the soup, And sit up straight, And eat every bean And pee on your plate." I didn't question her advice… 'cause moms are never wrong… But because of it, Now I'll only consume legumes When I'm alone. So, mamas, when you give advice, I urge you to be wary, Lest your kid, like me, Grows up to be A victim of vocabulary.