Some Sun Drunk Day He Said

Emotions war against sense, And his mind remains A pot pourri, And thoughts in his head When he lies in his bed Would make Dorian Gray Appear pristine. He wishes to moralize On a corrupt example, Yet from the wicked cup He hath supped a sample.   He appears to think in extremes; He is beau-laid and realist, Whose inspiration stems from his dreams. "Life is a beautiful strain for me," One sun-drunk day he said, "But I pray I say what my soul needs to Before the heavens decide me dead." But his mind is a disorderly drawer Full of confused categorizations; He has that Scott Fitzgerald illness For dates, times, rhymes and quotations. "I have a clear flowing mind, But I cannot foretell When the clogging black clouds will arrive, For they will arrive. Live with the love, then bear the pain Recurrent like the monsoon rain."   He is afraid of happiness For the inevitable despair that must follow it; Afraid of happiness For its cruel impermanence. Like Zola, the seasons in life, for him, Are inevitable. "All artists," he says, "are at once alike and unique One day, it's clear, The next, hazy, like a beery vision, The fulfilment that they seek." Misty dreams of sweet-smelling roses And swaying streams Bring him chills and pains in his soul and being; He lives his life through a melancholy tragedy, And has an ever-yearning mind. ("Some Sun Drunk Day He Said" has the dubious honour of being a near-unadulterated slice of juvenilia, having been conceived as some kind of poem when I was about 20 years old.)