Soldier

I’m here, in this terror. Blood, blood puddles everywhere like after a demonic storm of rain, but instead it’s human red liquid . Splattering, leaking and escaping.  More of it appears at each second . Tick, splat. Tock splat two more bodies morphed into devastating dead corpses floating in scarlet lakes. Lives lost; heartless killing! It could have been me. Boom! Went the exploding grenade ... I couldhave been dead, but I’m still here. Around me soldiers running away from thestomp of guns like human ants marching rapidly from their hunter, without a plan and without the guarantee of survival. Millions of bullets shooting in every direction, I cannot even detect from which direction they are coming from. Murdering happens here because of forced hatred, which is inhumane... whoever started the chapter of this horrific and barbaric dystopian novel should be ashamed. On my side – dead intimidating bodies of my friends that I will never see talking again- that have risked their lives for this country. I respect them. Ilooked at my blood covered hands; my blood is still within me. But for how much longer? Some nearly dead people gasping for help, wishing to be at home right now... ... Remembering the smell of freshly baked delicious bread that was placed on the table every morning. My little daughter running happily down the stairs ready for school, and my gentleman-like elder son always pulling the chair out for her. My wife always had everything so well managed I just don’t know how she did it, but I love her she is the best thing in my life. We all sat with smiles on our faces and the sun peeking in on us happily shines on our tired faces. Optimism flowing from all of our souls except mine. They all were prepared to start the new day. My children for school and my wife for work and to cook something ambrosial for us to eat at dinner.  She would have put a lot of work in to her cooking, but yet I still complained, I yelled at my children and never had time for them as I was so self-centred. I hurt their feelings forgetting to go to their school plays, I been so horrible-definitely not the kind of dad they would deserve... Can they ever forgive me? I hope I get another chance, show them a different life, they should be able to depend on me –most importantly, they should be able to trust me. I hope it’s not too late to show that I have learned, from my mistakes. I want to praise them as they deserve. ... Holding back tears full of regret, my morals are confused and my mind is apprehensive. Will I ever see my family again? I am going insane. Now I wish I stayed home, but it would seem like I’m giving up, after all this did teach me a valuable lesson in life .This war is sickening to the stomach filled with brutality and ghastly behaviour. Cold blooded, temper less and outrageous; actions. Pain – everyone is feeling pain that is unimaginable. Here braveness and risking play a very important role… If no risky decisions were taken we all would probably be dead by now. I see people crying, young soldiers crying like babies as they weren’t aware of the level of danger that was waiting for them. Now they just want to believe it is just a dream. Factually speaking, all what is happening is a test of self will and goodness. On how you will behave towards others in life threatening circumstances. Will you be into act of selfishness?       The Loudness is outrageous, shoot! Bam! Boom! Pam! Shut in from every viewpoint ... My orientation is fading- I’m unable to concentrate incapable of stabilizing my thoughts; my heart is pounding five times more rapid than its usual beat. I have no idea where to secrete; none of what others examine seems to work. Where’s my group? Maybe they left me behind. I have to take every possibility into consideration; but teamwork is important here as it’s leaning on reliability and forgiveness. Life is the most precious thing you can ever have. We all have a life which is on same tier level. But, killing a life just shouldn’t happen.  We all will die one day its natural .You cannot escape unpredictable death. No matter how much you would want life to pause it won’t- for anybody. I’m sick and tired of this place I will get out of here alive... I think, I have to do it for my family. My family that I long to back home, I know I will adore every single second spend with them. I just pray I return safe and sound and can cuddle my wife again...