Notes About The Poem

 

 

skating upon saturn’s rings

         skating upon saturn’s rings 

             endless ice cold arcs
     innards of past moons shattered
            blades reopen wounds
        in my wake scars and chaos
       proof ~ that I was never here
Copyright © | Year Posted 2025

Poem

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12
Jama Avatar
February 25, 2025 at 10:52 AM
Thank you for writing for my contest. I am glad you could find inspiration in the prompt. "innards of past moons shattered," is such a deep and profound line. I love how you merged science with such depth and existentialism. Congratulations on your win.
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 27, 2025 at 2:24 AM
Heya Sara, I am delighted you appreciated the existential approach I took here, in your thought provoking contest , and even more delighted to have placed with such a short piece, to my own detriment perhaps I tend to visit existentialism upon almost everything I write!, thanks again! Cheers David
Anaya Avatar
February 25, 2025 at 10:12 AM
Congratulations David! Dramatic, well deserved!
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 25, 2025 at 10:39 AM
Thank’s Anaya, I am delighted this one went down so well, cheers David
Empress Avatar
February 25, 2025 at 7:56 AM
Dear david, altho this is short youv written something that shows your knowledge on saturn too in a subtle manner and also i love how you’ve mentioned “ past moons “ “b l a des reopen wounds and the last line! Its such a touching and a moving poem! And one worthy of definitely a top placement! And i see this was featured as potd too! Congratulations!! Pleasure reading this! Sending you light always
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 25, 2025 at 8:31 AM
Heya Ink! This one is indeed pretty short, yet hopefully says something existentially deep, shattered moons are the most likely cause of Saturn’s ring system, it’s pretty unlikely they have always been there, maybe one hundred million years old, which is quite young by universal standards, but they are quite magnificent, much thanks for stopping by, and leaving some light, cheers David
mysore Avatar
February 23, 2025 at 12:22 AM
it is sure chaos out there dear poet. congratulations on POTD. Cheers!!!
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 23, 2025 at 2:24 AM
Thank you Thriveni, chaos organised by chaos, and us humans left to try figure it all out, are we even here at all lol! Cheers David
Rodrigues Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 5:14 AM
interesting write, dear David! proof that I was never there…such a great line…and blades reopen wounds…emotive write. Congrats on POTD!
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 6:42 AM
Heya Kim, I think this is one of those written on a existential dreamscape level, but somehow resonates on a conscious plane, thanks so much for stopping by, cheers David
Hind Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Oh, and congrats on POTD!
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:48 AM
:)
Hind Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:59 PM
I really like this, a fav for me. :)
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:48 AM
Your fave has just made my day even better Paige, I really enjoyed putting this piece together, and I am delighted yo really like my poem, thank you so much, cheers David
M  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:45 PM
Congratulations David on POTD….Debx
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Thank you Deb, I’m delighted with the honour, cheers David
Nicole Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:09 PM
I must say, you were never there, because you are here. :) Sharing a silly thought. On a more serious note: You would never make it to the rings of Saturn. They're made of ice and rock and the outermost ring moves at 37,000 mph. Ouch ! Very dangerous, indeed. Your thought about reopening wounds, yes, that happens a lot. Congratulations David, on Poem of the Day. My best to you. Hugs, Brandy
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:43 AM
Heya Brandy, in our own subconscious universe we can be everywhere and nowhere all at once ;) I agree those gravitationally bound rings are very dangerous for us mere mortals to visit at the moment, probably best to observe them with our machines, old wounds I think most of us poets have a few, thanks so much for popping by with engaging comments, cheers David
Bartley Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Congrats on your POTD! That's some serious skating ... way out there! Thanks for sharing.
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Heya Benjamin, yes existential skating, really is (way out there) thanks so much for stopping by, cheers David
Parker Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 5:47 PM
POTD: mystical, haunting, evocative piece, DK. Well earned. +;o)
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:32 AM
Thank you Arlo, you express all the qualities I tried to portray in my Monoku, cheers David
Kitchin Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 12:13 PM
David, congratulations on POTD, a well penned creative poem.
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 12:21 PM
Thanks so much Tania, maybe there is a little piece of me on those rings after all :) cheers David
De Beaulieu Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 11:07 AM
Hello David, i thought I would walk around the Saturn Ring. Congrts on the POTD. enjoy your special day. /Darlene/
De Beaulieu Avatar
February 19, 2025 at 12:31 PM
Hello David, Oh what a lovely thought. enjoy your day my friend. /Darlene/
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Heya Darlene, who knows someday in another lifetime, we will all be doing laps around Saturn’s rings, thank you so much for stopping by, hope you’re keeping well! Cheers David
Eslinger Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 10:03 AM
Thank you for this one, David! I’ve thought of jogging round those rings, but forgot i’d quickly slip off wearing gym shoes. 8-). Bravo from a SCI channel & galaxy fan
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 10:54 AM
Ha you would need more than gym shoes Sally; the chances are anyone on the rings would just fall right through them, they are incredibly tenuous, thanks so much for stopping by with fun comment, cheers David
Anaya Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 7:43 AM
Tearing up with a bitesize gem, moment. Scars are signs of healing, way to go. Hey Saturn is in Pieces! whatever that means ;) It's really nice to celebrate the honor of POTD with you on this winter's day! Cheers and congratulations!
Anaya Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 4:08 PM
Pisces! sorry
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:53 AM
Heya Anaya! So many ways to interpret scars, physical ones usually are part of the healing process, psychological ones are possibly the opposite, the ones in my tanka have bits of both, I think you may well be right about Saturn being in pieces, I don’t know what it means either lol! Thanks so much for stopping by and that little tear, cheers David
Proxenos Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 7:40 AM
Hey David - Congratulations on an excellent and well deserved POTD - i Loved it and have faved it my friend. Blessings and hugs, Jennifer.
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:39 AM
Ah Jennifer good to hear from you, I’m delighted my little Tanka got POTD, and even more delighted with your fave, thank you so much, cheers David
Goldsmith Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 7:16 AM
Congratulations on your wonderful POTD win. I enjoyed reading this one. Do not skate off the side. Hahaha!!! Have a fun day writing away...................
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:37 AM
What you mean Paula I only ever skate on the side lol! Thanks so much for fun comment and congrats, cheers David
Pigeon Tart Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 5:15 AM
I’m twirling in celebration, my favourite little poem, Happy POTD! xomo
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:35 AM
Thank you Super Mo, My tanka’s designation as your little favourite poem, means a lot :) cheers David
Rodgers Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 5:13 AM
Hello David, I am not a good skater. Lol! As I read I thought how vast and intimate, cosmic yet achingly human. POTD well deserved. You cut like those blades, leaving something undeniable behind. Yes, keep skating those rings. Winter Blessings, My Friend, Daniel
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:33 AM
(Achingly human) feels about right Daniel, it’s all the proof I need right now, there is something undeniable about that fact, I believe you get the gist of my Tanka, thanks so much for stopping by, cheers David
Gifford Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 5:08 AM
Congratulations on your POTD win, with this beautifully crafted piece, David. Well deserved. Have a wonderful day, fellow poet.
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:18 AM
Heya Zyrool, sometimes they come together just right, I’m delighted to meet you, and with your comment, cheers David
May Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 4:45 AM
Congrats on POTD, Nicely done
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 8:15 AM
Thank you Joseph, I’m truly delighted with this one, cheers David
Jones Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 4:11 AM
Love this creative write! Congratulations on potd and you’ll do well in the contest!
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 4:32 AM
Heya Karen, thanks so much for stopping by with kind comments and congratulations, it’s early days in the contest, so will just put one skate in front of the other for now, and enjoy POTD! Cheers David
Seeker Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 1:53 AM
An intriguing Tanka, David, leaves us pondering. Congratulations on POTD
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 2:31 AM
Well to get the great Seeker intrigued is always a good sign, ponder away but do keep in mind the subconscious, (well you always do) thanks for stopping by, cheers David
Andresen Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 1:49 AM
- Interesting..."a lot" to read in a short poem, David - Congratulations on your p.o.t.d. ... enjoy :) - hugs
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Probably needs a few reads Anne-Lise, I had my abstract head on when writing, thanks so much, cheers David
Greenhough Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 1:03 AM
This is a perfect poem that describes skating. I enjoy reading. Congratulations on POTD.
Kavanagh  Avatar
February 18, 2025 at 1:29 AM
Thanks Hilda, Skating with a pirouette into existentialism, was an enjoyable one to write, cheers David
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