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Size Does Matter

You've got the kind of cleavage that I really like A place where a man can really park his bike With two lovely legs, tanned to perfection by the sun Now I'm going cross eyed watching the wiggle of your bum. Why don’t men think with their brains, not what’s in their pants When we got down to action I wish you’d warned me in advance I gasped when I saw your ‘dangly bits’ I couldn’t believe my eyes I needed a magnifying glass … you told me lies about the size! You said size didn't matter , Oh what a fibber you are As you pushed your legs through the back windows of the car You also said I was marvelous for the two minutes I was in I knew I should never trust a woman who had been guzzling gin 27th August 2015

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Njeri Hunjeri

Date: 8/30/2015 4:34:00 PM

Lol, you guys...i love the name Jadazzle united. It seems so jadazzle-..licious :-)

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/30/2015 5:25:00 PM

I came up with the name when we first started collaborating now we really are jadazzle reunited back writing together after a year - best news of the year when Darren got back in contact with me:-) hugs Jan xx

Eve Roper

Date: 8/28/2015 8:38:00 PM

Naughty, Jan a 7 hugs Eve

Jan Allison
Date: 8/29/2015 1:29:00 AM

I'm not naughty Eve - I just follow Darren and he is a great teacher lol seriously the humour has flowed with us since day one he truly is my poetry soul mate and to be writing together again is a dream come true for us both :-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 8/28/2015 6:15:00 PM

Naughty naughty, you guys are such a hoot!!

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 6:41:00 PM

You can tell Darren is back on the scene - as you know I am never usually naughty - of course Darren would disagree and say it is all me lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Alexis Y.

Date: 8/28/2015 5:01:00 PM

Lol. This is funny:-)Alexis

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 5:27:00 PM

We had such fun when we first started writing then unfortunately Darren got ill - now a year later we are carrying on from where we left off - the words still flow without any alteration and the friendship we have continues to grow - a dream has come true for us both:-) hugs Jan xx

Neva Romaine

Date: 8/28/2015 3:42:00 PM

Hey Jadazzle United, stopped by for a visit. This is an amazing work of art and a most excently collaboration between the three of you. I laughed so hard tears came to my eyes. Well done! Be Blessed, Neva

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 4:20:00 PM

Thanks Neva - just the two of us writing together - Darren has been unwell for some time and only recently come back to soup writing together again after a year is simply a dream come true:-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen

Date: 8/28/2015 2:33:00 PM

...... A mathematical size ..... it has no theory .... but maybe in practice ... :))) - hugs // Anne-Lise :)

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 2:42:00 PM

LOL:-) Am so glad the jadazzle humour is flowing... there is more to come lol:-) hugs JAN XX

Emile Pinet

Date: 8/28/2015 12:55:00 PM

You all have fun with this piece from start to finish and it brings a smile and a chuckle to start my day. Emile.

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 1:01:00 PM

Darren and I had such fun writing before he had a break and the spark is still there a year later - humour still flows from our pens it is so so good to be writing together once again:-) hugs Jan xx

Kp Nunez

Date: 8/28/2015 12:12:00 PM

:-) naughty duo...

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 12:58:00 PM

Oh I never admit to which lines I write - remember I am Jan/Stan so I can write from any point of view lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 12:15:00 PM

Oh Kim how lovely of you to drop by - as you know I am always well behaved I am never naughty! - Of course we never disclose who wrote what so I can simply say its Darren's influence on me ..... oh it is sooooo good to be writing again and for Jadazzle to be re-united :-) hugs Jan xx

Demetrios Trifiatis

Date: 8/28/2015 10:11:00 AM

Style and humor is interwoven in this fine collaboration with, Jan! Made me smile dear J.U.

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 10:28:00 AM

We have always had such fun when we write Demetrios - I have another 5 poems to post in due course - just to be writing together again really proves dreams do come true:-) Hugs Jan xx

Arthur Vaso

Date: 8/28/2015 12:17:00 AM

LOL, my stomach hurts from laughing!

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/28/2015 8:23:00 AM

Thanks Arthur we do love to raise a smile:-) Writing together really means so much to us both and Jadazzle are well and truly reunited:-) Hugs jan xx

Joseph May

Date: 8/27/2015 6:07:00 PM

You two are a great comedy team...best wishes...

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 6:35:00 PM

Thanks Joseph - it has been a tough time for us both but we are back up and writing again after a year and the humour still flows - we have such fun writing together:-) hugs Jan xx

Tim Smith

Date: 8/27/2015 5:30:00 PM

lol...nothing wrong with a "little" white lie. Short and sweet : )

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 5:33:00 PM

LOL yes it was definitely short Tim lol:-) hugs Jan xx ... oh I hope Darren doesn't read my comment hee hee hee good job we have never met - we tease each other all the time which is great:-) hugs Jan xx

Poet Destroyer A

Date: 8/27/2015 4:54:00 PM

Then, I am happy for you :) Jan.. thank you for the reply... :)

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 5:10:00 PM

:-) hugs Jan xx

Poet Destroyer A

Date: 8/27/2015 4:40:00 PM

I'm just gonna say.. WOW! Jan and Derren :) LINDA

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 4:44:00 PM

LOL Linda it is so so wonderful to be writing with Darren again the humour still flows between us - this is the 4th poem we have posted since we got back together - another 5 poems are written and ready to post... Jadazzle truly are reunited:-) I don't think we could be happier:-) Hugs jan xx

Thomas Martin

Date: 8/27/2015 2:43:00 PM

Well. . .interesting! Though naughty! Only wish that I had been there!

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 2:54:00 PM

LOL me too ... Darren and I have never met but we sure have fun when we write lol:-) hugs jan xx

Eileen Manassian

Date: 8/27/2015 1:20:00 PM

Oh me...Oh MY! You got me with the title and kept me IN there for the whole duration of this write....Good one, you two. I'd write more, but I'm being good. Hugs

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 2:08:00 PM

ha ha ha:-) You know what I mean he is a cheeky chappie and I love him to bits lol:-) Hugs Jan xx

Eileen Manassian
Date: 8/27/2015 2:05:00 PM

Cheekiness??? I didn't know it was his cheeks that got you upset but rather what was on the other side....oh dear. ;) Great to read you two again. Hugs

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 1:34:00 PM

Oh Eileen it is so so so good to be writing with Jadazzle humour again - you can understand why I have missed him so much as Daz is such fun to work with and our poems continue to flow without changing a word - I can blame all the cheekiness on him of course lol :-) hugs Jan xxx

Carol Eastman

Date: 8/27/2015 11:53:00 AM

This homorous poem was great to read. Love the ending!

Jadazzle United
Date: 8/27/2015 11:55:00 AM

Thanks Carol Darren and I have SUCH fun when we write together - we share the same sense of humour - writing together again is simply a dream come true for us both:-) hugs Jan xx

Jan Allison

Date: 8/27/2015 11:25:00 AM

It is so so wonderful to get the jadazzle humour flowing again Daz:-) Love and hugs Jan xx