Sink or Swim

A tropical vacation that I never shall forget The clearest cleanest ocean that I’ve ever seen as yet I dabbled in a rock pool with a bamboo handled net I told my wife, “It’s just for fun, to see what I might get.” She said, “I know you all too well, you’re looking for a pet, But look around, there’s no one here - you’ll never find a vet. So go check out that ocean blue and get your Speedos wet, I’ve never seen you swim a stroke; not since the day we met.” I couldn’t let her know why I broke out in such a sweat The fact I never learnt to swim is something I regret But I was loathe to let my children’s mother see me fret And so I said, “I think instead, I’ll have a cigarette.” How soon we stepped on British tarmac from our Jumbo Jet My wife waved to our eldest son who’d brought his red corvette She handed him a ten pound note and said, “That clears my debt, You’re right, your father cannot swim: I guess you won the bet.”