Shadows

A dark shadow is weighing me down I want so badly to be able to smile But I can only frown. A sense of despair has weakened my soul and my heart I push everyone away Before any chance of happiness can start Emotions run through me but escape and explode I can’t excuse them And apologies grow old Alive yet,dead and unable to break free This dark shadow is holding me down But,nobody can see I run and run but my feet don’t touch the ground Unable to move forward And I am to blame that nobody is around My body aches My heart is numb Blaming others for the mistakes I’ve done Words no longer mean a thing when actions destroy them all Hurting those I love No longer answering my call The black shadow holds me down and takes my life away from me I try to look past it But, truth is blinded by illusion in its way for me to see I try to escape and try to hide Efforts go wasted Despite how many attempts I tried Apologies mean nothing when they aren’t there anymore to hear Tears fall down But, are dried up by fear Frozen and fragile and about to break Unable to take back the regrets Or fix another mistake The black shadow takes hold of me and controls the thoughts inside my head Irrational and explosive outbursts without reason Unsure of why I spoke the cruel things I said My soul is lost and can’t find its way I wear bruises and scars inside of me That will never go away No medicine can heal them and no herb can ease the pain The black shadow has me hostage Driving me insane If I have ever hurt you, please listen to these words and know that they are real If I pushed you away or drifted off Please forgive me for the pain I made u feel If I knew how to stop it I would find a way But until the dark shadow releases me from its grasp There are no words to describe the regrets I live with each day