Rum N Raisin 9 - France Or Bust

Raisin gave the globe a tap to make it slowly spin “Rum,” she said, “it’s quite a big wide world we’re living in.” Rum looked up from lapping milk and wiped some from his face, “Use your nose to stop the globe and we’ll explore that place.” The cat flap closed behind them and they marched off up the road And pretty soon they came upon a clever looking toad Rum said, “Could you help us, we’ve made France our destination.” The toad said, “You must cross the sea for that romantic nation.” Raisin glanced around and said, “I can’t see any sea. In fact it could be anywhere; please point the way for me.” The toad said, “On this island you should just keep going straight And you will find the seashore, be it early, be it late.” They thanked the toad, and took the road that looked quite long and straight But after just a dozen steps the helpful toad yelled, “Wait!” He called, “I wouldn’t walk it for you’ll walk until you drop, I always find that on long walks, it’s easier to hop!” So Rum n Raisin hopped along the road and very soon Their legs began to tire with the rising of the moon Finally they slumped against a tree and rested there They lay there for a while with their legs stuck in the air A passing bat took pity and said, “I don’t wish to pry, But if your journey’s long you’ll find it easier to fly.” Raisin said, “We’re heading for the sea but we are cats We do not have the wings to fly like you night flying bats The bat just licked his finger and he held it in the air He said, “A wind is coming, but I wonder if you dare To borrow from a washing line, a sheet and hold on tight For then the wind will lift you up and fly you through the night Well, yes, the wind picked up the sheet, and Rum n Raisin too But, no, it didn’t go too well although they surely flew Rum was screaming in the night and knew not what to do When he could feel his morning milk about to pass on through Raisin cried, ”We’re cats, we don’t just doo-doo anywhere And certainly not when we’re half a mile in the air.” Rum just grinned a grin that said, “It’s way too late for me.” And that was when one corner of the sheet caught in a tree. As Rum n Raisin lay there with their faces in the dirt A mole popped up his head and said, “Now look, my name is Burt, And if you ask for my advice you’ll stick to land that’s firm And I would say the best way is to dig just like a worm.” Rum n Raisin thought about it… then kept heading south The mole was leant against the tree… a carrot in his mouth Rum said, “That was mean, he only offered his advice.” Raisin said, “If someone says ‘just walk’, that would be nice.” So, as they walked and as they talked, they held their tails up high Rum n Raisin soon forgot their journey in the sky Soon, the sun was coming up and neither one felt bitter Then up ahead they saw the water sparkling like glitter “It’s the sea,” Rum cried, “It’s right there, just beyond the trees.” And soon enough they paddled with the water to their knees (No one told them water was a thing they shouldn’t like) And then they met a fish that told them, “My name’s Mike the Pike.” Rum said, “Nice to meet you but we do need to be gone, We’re on a big adventure, so we must be moving on.” Mike the Pike said, “If you want to know what gets my vote, Crossing this here water means that you should take that boat.” “Finally,” said Raisin, “Someone makes a little sense, We’ll take the boat and soon we will be talking with the French.” They jumped aboard the boat; a motor would have been a gift But with the wind still blowing they soon found themselves adrift It took some time but finally they reached the other side And Raisin said, “I didn’t know it wasn’t very wide.” Rum said, “I can see a sign stuck in a clump of grass Perhaps it says ‘Welcome to France’, let’s find someone to ask.” They leapt out of the boat and Raisin said, “So what’s the plan?” Rum said, “We must speak in French, the very best we can.” Raisin said, “Don’t worry, we’ve heard mummy with her tapes, The ones she plays to practice for her overseas escapes.” Soon, they saw a chicken and they wondered what to say So Raisin did her best and asked her, “Parlour view on grey?” The chicken clucked, “It seems - cluck cluck - that you’ve faced quite a task. So what - cluck cluck- has brought you here - cluck cluck - if I may ask?” Raisin said, “We’ve travelled here by water, sky and land, We wondered, would you read this sign that we can’t understand. Does it say ‘Welcome to France’ - but please leave out the clucks.” The chicken read out loud, “THE POND: PLEASE DON’T FEED THE DUCKS.”