Retired Romance : Repost

...Now I ain't without notoriety,
Fact is.. I'm an old stalker with a walker.
She was big in the Purple Hat Society
and broke her hip,...while playing soccer.

When I met her, she was on the mend,
and she knew.. what I was after...
and I said I'd catch her when I can,
She said to push that walker a lil' faster.

She had her a "lectric wheel chair,
I just had my old walker and me,
she was pretty fast for a blue hair...
"till I crashed into her I.V. tree...

Well, they fitted my leg with plaster,
and I kinda forgot what I was after...
"till one day,
she wheeled in to see me,
Yep.  Said she'd come ta free me!

Now we sit together,
cozy up and talk about the weather.
We compare wrinkled tatoos,
and guess what they are,
we may share a shot of booze,
we don't go too awful far...

We keep our orthepedic shoes
under the same bed,
and I retired as a walker stalker,
meals on wheels keeps us fed
and we keep our teeth...
in the very same locker.

("Nite Nite, Darlin.")


First of Ike and Jane sequence...Reposted to help PD with smiles request. : )

Copyright © | Year Posted 2011



Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 11/26/2011 7:28:00 AM
Oh Robert, hilarious. I worked with seniors and so much of this is true except I never knew a pair that kept their shoes under the same bed! You take fun to great levels!
Login to Reply
Date: 7/20/2011 6:17:00 PM
Added as one of my favorites! Absolutley hilarious!! Congrats. to you!
Login to Reply
Date: 7/17/2011 3:07:00 AM
It is really funny,Robert.Many congrats!
Login to Reply
Date: 7/16/2011 1:48:00 PM
Many congrats on your wins, Robert : )
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 8:26:00 PM
Of the ones I'd seen previously, This was MY personal favorite, Robert. a big congratulations to you!
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 7:34:00 AM
Congratulations on the 2nd place win.
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 7:12:00 AM
Congratulations on the second place win in the contest, Robert
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 7:02:00 AM
This is so cute....I will have to read more about Ike and Jane....(would be a delightful series to put into a book form!!) :) Congratulations, Robert!
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 5:26:00 AM
Congrats Robert on your win...very funny write..enjoyed.
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 5:15:00 AM
I could just picture the two of you - great write and great win. congratulations. Mike
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 5:00:00 AM
Congratulations Robert on the win in P.D.'s "Funny Poem" contest. Love, Carol
Login to Reply
Date: 7/15/2011 1:18:00 AM
Congrats on your win with this amusing write! Best wishes Em :)
Login to Reply
Date: 7/14/2011 9:34:00 PM
lol.... thank you Robert, for such a great smile. , Congratulations on your number 2 spot in my contest! Thank you for entering your awesome and funny poem in my contest and also supporting my contest. have yourself a great and wonderful night. ,..p.d.
Login to Reply
Date: 7/14/2011 9:10:00 PM
Haha! I love that part of you keeping your teeth in the same locker-- how sweet :D Very funny write, Robert :) Enjoyed this one--- Super congrats on your win :D
Login to Reply
Date: 7/14/2011 9:03:00 PM
Congrats Robert on your wonderful win in funny poem contest with this witty treat luv..
Login to Reply
Date: 7/14/2011 8:06:00 AM
It was a pleasure to read your poetry this morning Robert. Thank you for posting and sharing with us. I will be back again soon to read more. Love, Carol
Login to Reply
Date: 7/13/2011 8:58:00 PM
This is adorably funny. LOVE it.
Login to Reply
Date: 7/13/2011 8:58:00 PM
and I am glad to finally be seeing the BEGINNING of that Ike and Jane sequence.
Login to Reply
Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Reflection on the Important Things

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
Store
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter
Hide Ad