Refurbished Nursery Rhymes: Humpty Dumpty

...Look, Ma, I'm flying! When fat, stoned Humpty Dumpty tumbled off that high wall, He was laughing so hard he scarcely noticed the fall. He cracked his shell, I'm assumin' 'cause out leaked his albumen and most of his cholesterol. By some fluke he survived, though more dead than alive, And his bulb was beginning to dim. When the king's men inspected, They found him too disconnected to be resurrected, And the chance that he'd make it was slim. What started out to be fun, if you'll pardon the pun, Turned out that the blame, and the "yolk", were on him.