Connie was a looker, forty years ago.
Connie's still a looker, she looks like cookie dough.
You'll often find sweet Connie, talking to a mirror
Sayin, "Mirror mirror on the wall, please shrink my saggy rear!"
Connie, Connie camp queen,
Queen of the motor home park.
Earl was a looker, forty years ago.
Earl's still a looker, though you wouldn't know,
By looking at old Earl cause you're blinded by his nose
and just like Rudolph Reindeer's, you'd even say it glows.
Well Connie married Earl, back in sixty-six,
some would say the both of them had passed up better picks,
but to this very day, they're very much in love,
they stick together firmly, like fingers on a glove.
Earl drives the motorhome, Connie rides along,
With her with dog menagerie, what a throbbing throng,
of Pekinese and Poodles, a Pit Bull and a Pom,
Now tell me this, Amigos, what could possibly go wrong?
When campin' at the RV park, Connie soon takes charge,
of anything and anyone, ain't bigger than a barge.
No one's crossed ol' Connie up and lived to tell it yet.
I wouldn't cross ol' Connie on a million dollar bet!
Earl likes to disappear, he heads off to the bar,
But Connie keeps a tight leash, he don't get very far.
Keepin' Earl's sanity requires many beers.
I think it's a miracle, he's made it all these years!
Connie went commando one day, went back to her roots,
wearin' nuttin' 'neath her miniskirt, above her GoGo boots.
Someone hollered: "Go find Earl, I think he oughta know,
his favorite girl Connie is puttin' on a show!"
Well listen little doggies, you never more will roam.
'Cause Connie and old Earl are in an old folk's home,
but Earl is just as happy as if he had good sense,
when he wants to drink a beer, he climbs the wire fence.
Copyright © lim'rik flats | Year Posted 2017