Get Your Premium Membership

Queen of the Motorhome Park


Connie was a looker, forty years ago.
Connie's still a looker, she looks like cookie dough.
You'll often find sweet Connie, talking to a mirror
Sayin, "Mirror mirror on the wall, please shrink my saggy rear!"


Connie, Connie camp queen,
Queen of the motor home park.


Earl was a looker, forty years ago.
Earl's still a looker, though you wouldn't know,
By looking at old Earl cause you're blinded by his nose
and just like Rudolph Reindeer's, you'd even say it glows.

Repeat Chorus


Well Connie married Earl, back in sixty-six,
some would say the both of them had passed up better picks,
but to this very day, they're very much in love,
they stick together firmly, like fingers on a glove.

Repeat Chorus


Earl drives the motorhome, Connie rides along,
With her with dog menagerie, what a throbbing throng,
of Pekinese and Poodles, a Pit Bull and a Pom,
Now tell me this, Amigos, what could possibly go wrong?

Repeat Chorus


When campin' at the RV park, Connie soon takes charge,
of anything and anyone, ain't bigger than a barge.
No one's crossed ol' Connie up and lived to tell it yet.
I wouldn't cross ol' Connie on a million dollar bet!

Repeat Chorus

Earl likes to disappear, he heads off to the bar,
But Connie keeps a tight leash, he don't get very far.
Keepin' Earl's sanity requires many beers.
I think it's a miracle, he's made it all these years!

Repeat Chorus


Connie went commando one day, went back to her roots,
wearin' nuttin' 'neath her miniskirt, above her GoGo boots.
Someone hollered: "Go find Earl, I think he oughta know,
his favorite girl Connie is puttin' on a show!"

Repeat Chorus


Well listen little doggies, you never more will roam.
'Cause Connie and old Earl are in an old folk's home,
but Earl is just as happy as if he had good sense,
when he wants to drink a beer, he climbs the wire fence.

Repeat Chorus

Copyright © | Year Posted 2017

Post Comments
Please Login to post a comment
Date: 10/22/2017 10:02:00 PM
Fun read.
Login to Reply
Date: 8/14/2017 7:49:00 AM
A prodigious work of humour. Love to here it sung. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!
Login to Reply
flats Avatar
lim'rik flats
Date: 8/23/2017 9:24:00 AM
Not by my voice! ;-)
Date: 7/24/2017 12:51:00 AM
Hi John , I enjoyed these lyrics and the format as well. I was singing along to this lyrical tale in my head. Connie and Earl were some couple. And you know I'm a fan of your humorous writes. Well done:-) Alexis
Login to Reply
flats Avatar
lim'rik flats
Date: 7/24/2017 8:41:00 AM
Thanks for singing along Alexis! Hmm... I'm not sure the world needs more "stuck-in-my-head" songs;-) Like Feliz Navidad? Whoops, now I'll have that going around up stairs all day:-) Huggietunes! ~ john
Date: 7/23/2017 10:53:00 AM
Ode of Connie and Earl is quite entertaining and funny, John!
Login to Reply
flats Avatar
lim'rik flats
Date: 7/24/2017 8:34:00 AM
Thanks for singing along! ~ j