Pet Rocks Fall

Pet rocks fall on hard times They don't commit crimes or suicide Stones never come back once thrown Never talk again once insulted (Rocks hate being called stones) Never refer to them as ore or else They demand equality To be viewed as gender neutral To be treated like rocks not objects Never as humans They want equal pay To be made of granite Or something smooth like sand Their silence is proof of that Rocks are not persons or places They are things not human beings Don't discriminate Refrigerate pets to keep them fresh Don't get them mad or arrested Avoid broken glass and windows Don't ask rocks questions They are not great thinkers but listeners The law requires rocks to be leashed Walked twice a week on beaches In parks, rocks don't bark Carry extra plastic baggies Avoid accidents when you can Don't smoke or get stoned around rocks Use sound judgment dealing with solids Rocks fall from the sky all the time Be kind to your comets and asteroids Love them or face retribution Extraterrestrial objects are brutal Some rocks are cruel. Most are not If you give them cell phones They never call home Pet rocks forget where they came from Can you blame them Just look at their owners