Pet Rocks Fall
Pet rocks fall on hard times
They don't commit crimes or suicide
Stones never come back once thrown
Never talk again once insulted
(Rocks hate being called stones)
Never refer to them as ore or else
They demand equality
To be viewed as gender neutral
To be treated like rocks not objects
Never as humans
They want equal pay
To be made of granite
Or something smooth like sand
Their silence is proof of that
Rocks are not persons or places
They are things not human beings
Don't discriminate
Refrigerate pets to keep them fresh
Don't get them mad or arrested
Avoid broken glass and windows
Don't ask rocks questions
They are not great thinkers but listeners
The law requires rocks to be leashed
Walked twice a week on beaches
In parks, rocks don't bark
Carry extra plastic baggies
Avoid accidents when you can
Don't smoke or get stoned around rocks
Use sound judgment dealing with solids
Rocks fall from the sky all the time
Be kind to your comets and asteroids
Love them or face retribution
Extraterrestrial objects are brutal
Some rocks are cruel. Most are not
If you give them cell phones
They never call home
Pet rocks forget where they came from
Can you blame them
Just look at their owners
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