Panic Disorder With Adhd and Bipolar 1

I've been labeled by society, mentally ill Here go ahead, just take this pill. The mystical gates of Heaven close as I cross Hell is bound to me on earth, my spirit is lost. I wake from my slumber knowing this, My dreams have left me, I hardly exist. I hold in my hand one yellow, one blue I hesitate to take them, the choice is up to you Happiness for me comes in a pill Knowing that thought makes me more ill. I lay back to sleep Im free once again Knowing when I wake its just me and this pen. "How are you feeling, how was your day" I know if I tell the truth Im going back away Locked in a room, closed windows and doors The only thing I'll have left is what I adore. For an hour or so my mind is free Than the pills just wont let me be. My dreams fade to dirt remembering my whole life thats hurt.