Overweight Vampires

Pardon me but have you seen an overweight vampire pass by this way within the last couple thousand years?

Come to think of it, I've never seen a fat vampire
It's not like they get a lot of exercise
Laying around all day in their own grave 
You would think they'd a bit larger in size

I mean don't they ever get hungry
So hungry they say they could die
That's hard as the walking dead with no lives left
Bet they'd love if blood came deep Southern fried

Do they prefer meat eaters over vegetarians
Do they like their veins to be grain feed
Or they picky or not with the choices they've got
And would they settle for whatever is left

It'd be nice if they could at least enjoy desert
Maybe a slice of Red Velvet cake 
With icing so cold, matching their dead empty soul
And red of course for reds bloody sake

Yes, all the vampires I know are skinny minnies 
Could be cause they only know how drink
I find it kind of cruel as all they can do is drool
Watching as living sit there and eat
Copyright © | Year Posted 2016

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Hoffman Avatar
August 8, 2016 at 8:32 PM
Lol, come to think of it, they are all skinny minnies! Another unique one Mike!:)
Turner Avatar
August 8, 2016 at 4:25 PM
Probably having a Bloody Mary. Thanks Mike for the daily smile.
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace