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One Dimensional

We must be careful that we don’t become As one dimensional as our shadow Life is an ever-changing thing What we are today May not be what we are tomorrow We must learn how to adapt To the ever changing tides of life I have been questioning who I am Because in the last five years My life and who I am has changed many times The devil attacks me on many levels For he knows how to distort the truth And turn my mind against myself Thankfully my wife knows how to help me see That even though my disabilities keep me from work My own desire to help others Keeps me busy throughout each and everyday Many elderly people in my community Have come to depend on me in many ways I found out that I won’t be released to work till 09 If even then For almost two years I have been a housewife Battling diseases and injuries Waiting and hoping to get back to work Now I learn that may not happen without retraining I don’t really even know what this poem is about All I know is that the Lord is leading me to something And the devil is trying to get me to throw it all away I feel like a ping-pong ball Getting slapped back and forth between the two I know that I’ve became a good housewife And never does anyone ask me for help That I don’t do all I can to help them The Lord blesses me for my efforts As my wife comforts me Whatever the Lord leads me to be I will become Because my wife has ask me to not be As one dimensional as my shadow You know I posted this poem (if you could even call it that) and deleted it three times in a row. I think I'm asking for prayer for guidance. My wife thinks I'm right where I need to be and I should just accept it and keep doing what I'm doing and go back to Collage full time. This sure isn't what I thought recovery would be. God Bless you all.

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Colin Mitchell Williams

Date: 10/21/2008 9:53:00 AM

A Brave and heartfelt write Micheal. I find the truth is, that nobody really knows what they are doing and suffering make it worse... but I also find it has a lot to do with focus... focusing on what you "do" have and what you "can" do.. its hard I know when you look around and see the world behaving with what appears to be a Lucky normality... I would say "go back to Collage"... what you discover there may give you all the answers you need.... don't judge your work by the cleverness of others

Diana Hill

Date: 8/30/2008 6:38:00 AM

This is from the heart. God uses our words to help other people walk in His foot steps. Your wife is given to you from God, listen to her she loves you. I wrote to you on the e-mail that you sent did you get it.

Vince Suzadail Jr.

Date: 8/28/2008 9:19:00 AM

Hang in there Michael. The toughest roads always are the most rewarding. God Bless. Keep on truckin'. Vince

Carrie Richards

Date: 8/27/2008 6:24:00 AM

Dear friend. Your writings are the first I've read today, I hear such pain and worry in your words. After all you have been through in the past, there are reasons things happen the way they do. A plan that we don't always understand. You have a gift to give others, and are doing it every day right here on the Soup. You are a brightness to others in trouble.Listen and embrace your wife's faith in you.Keep the hope alive, and know we think of you even when the computer is turned off. Love, Carrie

Christy Hardy

Date: 8/27/2008 6:03:00 AM

Michael, sometimes we are blinded by what is right in front of our eyes. God has a plan, but until He is ready to reveal it, you must keep your Faith. Your wife is your beacon in the night, trust her as you love her..I believe your calling will be a Minister, I have a strong feeling God will take you places you never dreamed you would be...I love you my friend, you are surronded by many blessings....Always, Christy

P Sheart

Date: 8/27/2008 6:00:00 AM

Hello Michael Being concious of all that we feel is what it means to be a spiritual warrior. When you feel all of your intentions in your beautiful heart Michael, feel not what your mind tells you but what your heart tells you. A beautiful spirit of love and light that is interdependant on friends and family to make ones own heart sing! We all need each other thank goodness right. Smile....Stay well Many blessings to you and your family. Love Light Truth Patricia

Michael Degenhardt

Date: 8/27/2008 4:53:00 AM

I think you are clearly revealing yourself even moreto us. You'reopening up and my friend, there's no shame in being a housewife, if that's what God wants. We help each other daily in so many different ways. Think what it would be like for just 1 person if your weren't there. I bet you'll become aware of yourself even more then. Maybe not a poem my friend, but it is an excellent write about a terrific individual. Michael

Kristin Reynolds

Date: 8/27/2008 3:40:00 AM

My dear, trust your wife (and God) for they both know just where you should be and what you should be doing (I think you already know that, but may have restless feet like I do) but in the end, you will be right where you need to be. The future is now, live like there is no tomorrow...God bless, Kristin