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Once Upon a Tom

Once upon a Tom,
When he had nothing on,
A foolish man seemingly calm
Stood before his door
Need I say more?

The police came quite quick,
Said he was mentally sick,
Threw a blanket over him,
To cover his naked limb

They hauled him off to jail,
Said there was no bail,
Indecent was not the charge
They said his body was too large

No one needed to see his flesh
And his physique did not seem to mesh
As his feet were too big,
And he wore a pubic wig,

So ten years he had to serve,
Because he had such nerve,
To scare the neighbors away,
And so they still do say

Too much Tom
On one's hands,
Stifles up
The strongest glands

Now in long years inside his cell,
The tale of a naked Bell
Is what every inmate will tell
Was surely a sight from hell.

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