On Chance, Fate, Probability, and the Fear of Death

It's always struck me as amazing how folks will buy more lottery tickets as the odds increase, so long as the prize money increases. The recent billion dollar lottery sent the masses into a frenzy--and yes, I bought a couple tickets, even though I'm aware what 1 in 300,000,000 means:if that were our daily odds of dying, most of us would live practically forever. (For perspective, your odds of being killed in a car crash are 1 in 3,000 every time you drive.) We talk about 'chance encounters' but is it really just luck? When is a co-incidence too improbable to be random? For 50+ years I've read daily a newspaper, but 2 parts I never read:the sports page and obits. Never! So why did one day the middle-age me start reading the obits until I came across the name of a woman I had a summer romance with in college; it petered out when we went to separate colleges in different regions of the country. I was shocked to read of her sudden death (heart defect) and even more surprised when I grieved for her, an affair that had ended 20 years before. Should I take that as a mere co-incidence, as would my materialist friends, who believe only what they can measure in this world is real? I think it is closer to the 'real' reality to see it as 'Something' letting me know not only of B.'s passing, but that I loved her, for that is makes for grief. While the majority of scientists are atheists, the science with the largest % of believers (@ 40%) are mathematicians! Wow! the most logical science has the most believers in God! I was amazed to learn this, but having taken a college statistics course I understand how incredibly improbable EVERYTHING is, from the Universe, to Earth, to life, to human beings, to me and you. The odds are so long: for example, if gravity were just a mite stronger, the Universe would collapse unto itself, a tiny bit weaker, it would fly apart.We can't even understand what the Mind is, how we are sentient, how creativity happens. We look at history as random yet when I read it, I see mysteries abounding. George Washington many, many times subjected his tall body to enemy fire at the head of his army in 2 wars, the French and Indian (an Indian chief said he was one of the warriors protected by the Great Spirit) and the Revolution:yet he never got so much as a scratch (a couple times cannonballs did land at his feet). So many of us have been 'touched' by Mystery, writ both large and small, chance alone seems a naive belief. For me, I call it God.