Ode To The Flu
Oh no theres something alien in my stomach
something which want's very badly to come up
it's 4:30 in the morning and I feel very queasy
as I slide out of bed feeling quite uneasy
Was it something I chewed…right now I haven't a clue...
Making it to the latrine I put up the lid
psyching myself up as I get a grip
feeling like Mount Vesuvius about to erupt
and like that girl from the Exorcist as I empty my gut
I'm a hurly girly…giving my ufos a swirly…
As I slide back into bed I have a trusty pail
just in case I have to vomit again with the wind force of a gale
surprisingly I don't but still feel quite sick
so I call into work and explain to them very quick
My stomach is in knots and twists…would someone please call me an exorcist...
Then later my son say's Mom you look so pale
and goes out and buys me some Verner's ginger ale
I take a couple of sips and think maybe this will do the trick
but then about an hour later the vomiting doesn't quit
I need to be quarantined…very close to the latrine...
Alternating between the volcano eruptions and number two
I felt like a very sick zombie with an unkempt hairdo
wondering if it was something toxic that I had ate
I think maybe I should write my will out before its too late
My toilet and I have now formed a lasting bond…an inanimate object which I've grown quite fond...
But here it is the next morn and I ate some breakfast
hoping that it will stay in my stomach and last
I guess what I had was a 24 hour bout of the flu
glad its over now as I bid the stomach flu adieu.
I'm so glad we're through flu…oh no…..A…a..a-choo!!!
Copyright © cheryl hoffman | Year Posted 2018
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