Ode To a Golf Ball

O tiny, dimpled sphere, virginal white,  
Whooshing on your preordain-ed flight:     
What motivates your Lord to curses spew  
When you've done naught but to his swing be true?   

Slice, and down he calls the wrath of God  
On you and those who made you;  
Hook, and here he whines you failed to heed  
His clear intent to fade you.  

You moved, he reasons, at the bottom of the downswing of the shot  
(As if, inanimate jot, you have the power to move, or not).  
“You’re old,” he mutters when a feeble, graceless effort  
Sends you only laughing distance off the tee.  
“Too bold,” he sputters when a misselected iron 
Flies you over green to rest behind a tree.  

Err as physics dictate, and Lo!, you are to blame;
Perform as he expects of you, no credit's due, 
Only commands that you do more of same.  

You are twice cut by lethal hacks that scar your face with "smiles.” 
(“Grimace” is the better word.)  
While the acid words he throws at you,
The vitriol he blows at you,
Drain his duffer's bile.

Injustice is your lot, bedeviled wretch, until you cease 
Behind a bush or in some pond find peace;  
For when you’re lost in water, wood, or shrub, 
The cretin will commence to fault his club.

1/5/2016

Any Poem Contest
Sponsor: Broken Wings

Copyright © | Year Posted 2016



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Date: 2/19/2016 5:22:00 PM
I loved reading this creative poem, Steve; and in the process felt sorry for the golf ball! Thanks for sharing. ~ Regards // paul
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 2/21/2016 4:19:00 AM
Thanks, Paul. Funny thing is, I wrote this maybe 45 years ago, giving up on it then because I couldn't figure out a way to end it. A fresh look in response to the contest, and I saw the solution almost instantly.
Date: 2/19/2016 12:50:00 AM
Loved this first post. A belated welcome to PS, Steve!
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Date: 1/26/2016 10:13:00 PM
Steve, Congratulations on your winning poem. XOX - LINDA -
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/27/2016 5:23:00 AM
Thanks, Linda. You and others have made me feel very elcome here.
Date: 1/18/2016 8:55:00 AM
STEVE, Congrats on your any poem win. ** SKAT **
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/22/2016 3:04:00 PM
Very much appreciated.
Date: 1/17/2016 8:33:00 AM
Sounds like thoughts from a true golfer. Nicely written Steve.
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/22/2016 3:06:00 PM
Ah, more like a true duffer. But thanks.
Date: 1/16/2016 5:27:00 PM
made me smile Steve I attempted to play golf .. I failed dismally but loved the long walk:-) hugs Jan xx
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/16/2016 6:00:00 PM
Jan, you are in good company--the game is impossible for almost everyone. Even the professionals struggle. Anyway, thanks for writing.
Date: 1/16/2016 4:32:00 PM
Congratulations on placing in the contest! I do not know a thing about golf - very interesting poem in spite of that.
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/16/2016 6:05:00 PM
Susan, thank you. The only thing I know for sure about the game is that it's addictive.
Date: 1/14/2016 5:32:00 AM
Clap, clap, and a quiet hurrah. Great poem, a most enjoyable read indeed. I gave up golf many years ago when I kept the same ball for a whole 9 holes. Never made par, but I figured not loosing the ball was a high point.
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/14/2016 7:36:00 PM
God, I wish I could give up the game. Invariably, when I stand on the first tee, I'm optimistic. Invariably, when I'm walking off #18, I look at the golfers on #1 and feel sorry for them. And I keep going back. There's a golf course in hell, I'll bet.
Date: 1/7/2016 4:40:00 AM
Thank you all for the kind words and warm welcome.
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Date: 1/6/2016 12:20:00 AM
Steve, WELCOME to poetry soup. I hope you have fun with this wonderful community. You'll find many friendly poets who are ready to support and give positive feedback. I will enjoy following you and your poetry :) We are Lucky To Have you. Enjoy Poetry Soup:) Your New Poet Friend @-> LINDA <-@
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/31/2016 4:03:00 AM
A belated thank you for your warm welcome, Linda. I will try to follow your example with new arrivals.
Date: 1/5/2016 5:56:00 PM
Welcome to the Soup, Steve! Enjoyed your ode to that little dimpled orb...if your golf play is like your writing then I think you can hit them straight and far. Also got a laugh at the ending.
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Steve Grammatico
Date: 1/31/2016 4:04:00 AM
A belated thanks for your welcome, David. And I do play golf like I write: lots of swings and misses.
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