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No Longer On the Shelf - Used and Abused

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At one time it pulsated with love now my broken heart is an empty can dented through your repeated abuse You threw me against the wall and pierced me with your lies then continued to kick me when I was down treating me like a piece of worthless trash I now lie alone in the gutter of life Dented Cans Contest Sponsored by John Lawless 12-24-17

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Line Gauthier

Date: 4/19/2018 10:55:00 PM

Awesome, Jan. I love how you approached this challenge. Beautiful work. Well crafted. Congrats.

Jan Allison
Date: 4/20/2018 3:28:00 PM

Thanks so much Line:-) hugs jan xx

Ralph Sergi

Date: 1/24/2018 2:08:00 PM

Hi Jan: This is a far removal from your humorous poems and it was great. But please don't think I am type casting you!

Jan Allison
Date: 1/24/2018 6:45:00 PM

Thanks so much for your comment Ralph:-) I write far more humourous poems than serious ones and I think I surprise sometimes with a poem like this:-) I never know where my muse will take me:-) hugs Jan x

Maureen McGreavy The Insolent Rib

Date: 1/14/2018 12:58:00 PM

Holy mackeral that's a sharp potent pen! Well done Jan! mo hugs :)

Jan Allison
Date: 1/14/2018 2:09:00 PM

Thanks Mo: I do surprise with the occasional more serious poem:-) hugs Jan xx

Mick Talbot

Date: 1/14/2018 1:05:00 AM

Indeed a sad story, metaphorically kicked, (as you poetically put it), "into the gutter of life". Sadly whether it be physical, or mental abuse it is still an unwelcome common trait to the present day, whatever one's gender. A great take on 'dented cans', congrats... hugs... Mick

Jan Allison
Date: 1/14/2018 7:58:00 AM

Thanks so much for dropping by Mick I am so delighted John had my poem on the winner's page - domestic abuse is a difficult subject but we shouldn't shy away from writing about it:-) hugs Jan xx

John Lawless

Date: 1/13/2018 12:39:00 PM

A harsh poetic treatment of a problem that is all to common. Thanks for participating in the contest Jan

Jan Allison
Date: 1/13/2018 12:46:00 PM

Thanks so so much for the win John I am delighted to be on your list:-) hugs Jan xx

Curtis Moorman

Date: 12/27/2017 7:32:00 PM

I was raised that only a coward, not a man, will hit a woman! I live by that and will come to the defense of any woman who is going through it.

Jan Allison
Date: 12/27/2017 10:24:00 PM

You were raised well my friend, of course there is physical abuse but also mental abuse with words which can be just as damaging yet there are no outwardly visible signs of the hurt that is caused:-( hugs jan xx

Connie Marcum Wong

Date: 12/26/2017 12:22:00 AM

Whoa.....so sad that this is something that happens every day to women who deserve so much better. I hate to say it but being in the gutter would be a step up! Great writing Jan! : )

Jan Allison
Date: 12/26/2017 6:19:00 AM

oh Connie your comment especially the end sentence makes me so so sad :-( hugs jan xx

Agnes Krampe

Date: 12/25/2017 5:58:00 PM

Strong writing, creative take on the contest. Good luck!

Jan Allison
Date: 12/25/2017 6:09:00 PM

Thanks Agnes I'm not sure what John will think but I am pleased with the poem:-) I hope you have a lovely Christmas and a happy new Year:-)Having my son home is so special its been a lovely day:-) hugs jan xx

Nathan D.

Date: 12/25/2017 11:41:00 AM

Very cool take on the contest. Good luck and merry xmas

Jan Allison
Date: 12/25/2017 12:17:00 PM

Hey Nathan welcome back to soup! have a wonderful time over the festive period:-) hugs jan xx

Susan Ashley

Date: 12/24/2017 10:12:00 PM

A powerful and poetically beautiful write Jan. Every line shines but your first stanza is brilliant. An awesome write my friend. Best wishes for a win! ~Susan

Susan Ashley
Date: 12/25/2017 11:32:00 AM

Merry Christmas to you as well!

Jan Allison
Date: 12/25/2017 6:09:00 AM

Thanks so much Susan. Merry Christmas I hope you have a wonderful time over the festive period:-) hugs jan xx

Cheryl Hoffman

Date: 12/24/2017 8:19:00 PM

A realistically sad thought provoking write about domestic abuse Jan! Good luck in the contest!~Che :)

Jan Allison
Date: 12/25/2017 6:08:00 AM

Thanks Cheryl it was a difficult poem to write but i was inspired after seeing an article on how domestic abuse increases over the festive period:-( hugs jan xx

Duke Beaufort

Date: 12/24/2017 6:24:00 PM

Abuse is a bad thing. The way you used the can metaphor is uncanny.

Jan Allison
Date: 12/24/2017 6:26:00 PM

lovely pun there Duke, sadly there is an increase in domestic abuse over the festive period:-( hugs jan xx