No Escape

Fear acclimated to my very senses, a dire undertaking This is, living in the present, yet a time traveling mind Sent me to relive the past, not to learn from it, but as Punishment, a judgement of my weakness that silenced me post haste. A dead heart yearning to beat another day, it's dying remorse for careless actions performed against me in The cinema of my mind, a dark gothic amphitheater to which I am haunted by spectrals of the abuse forced upon my brain and body. I was not alone in this as my brother received the greater recompense for crimes he never, nor I, committed. Byproducts of guilt to shame us in to believing we were just No good. How then did he escape though I lagged behind? Not through death, but in to an echo of the desert longing For an oasis that was far more dangerous than the last. Bereft, I succumbed to the eternal heights of insanity, feverishly grabbing whatever I could that would do my sack of skin harm in hopes that I might escape this realm. To no avail. I searched on and on for a lantern of heaven to guide me To keep me safe, and for a season I was, but I suffered far More for a belief that in the end did me no good. There's no escape, no end in sight. Yet if I could give up, I'd do it with all my might.