Valerie The Heavy Hearted Poet Poet Free verse

My Vantage Point

When I look in my mirror
I don't see what you see
I see fear and failure
I see hate and anger
I see inner turmoil and scars of self destruction

What am I missing
I hear your words about what you see
But what you talk about is skin deep
I don't care about my face
I don't care about my body

If you don't see my mind or my heart
Then I must have fooled myself
I made me believe I am something I'm not
Someone worth anything you'd have to give up
I thought I was enough
That I was the person you could fall so deeply in love with
that nothing else would matter
no one else would matter
I thought maybe my presence lingered in your mind
long after I had gone
or that maybe my words haunted you as well
I'd hoped that I had spoken with such truth and spirit
that you would also believe in such a love that many ridicule

Now looking in the mirror I see doubt
I am self conscious 
and I am full of self loathing
How could I have been so wrong
wrong about what you saw
wrong about what I saw

Perhaps I am playing a part
so wrapped up in this fairy tale of a life only I have faith in
maybe the type of love I imagine isn't real...just an illusion
and maybe the person I thought I could be doesn't exist


my vantage point is front row center stage
the performance of my life
unfortunately I was the only one to attend

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William Gray February 16, 2015 at 10:46 AM A very sensitive and well written piece, Thanks Valerie!.

Herzel Poshiwa February 10, 2014 at 4:43 AM Wow V!!!...I'm wordless/speechless...this is a deep heartfelt poem.

Jiril Clemons September 15, 2013 at 12:59 PM Deep poem, Valerie. Such deep emotions expressed of unrequited love. Enjoyable poem overall. Check out some of mine, might find some you like. Peace

Marquis Mc Mills-Cooper August 30, 2013 at 11:26 AM Oh Valerie, your heart must be like the Grinch at the end of the movie, a size larger than the rest of us to fit all of those feelings and emotions you have inside. Your words read as if they were poured on the page versuses being written. Simply put, I absolutely love the emotion you write with -Good Job with this one! MC

Poet Destroyer A August 16, 2013 at 8:09 AM Hola Florida Gal.... reading this one again. I guess I can say I have myself a fairy tale life.. I wish it wasn't as dramatic as it sounds.... I can imagine your performance of a life time... always a friend, .... Linda....

Poet Destroyer A June 15, 2013 at 8:30 AM a deep hearted poet you are, we all fool ourselves thinking that we can have it all, in our hearts we know what love is but in reality it does not exist for love is the only bridge you can never cross, ... ~always Linda