My New Year's Resolutions: Humor

I have tracked my New Year's Resolutions over the years these are my fantastic results. Resolution One 2011: I will try to be more attentive to Lauren. 2012: I will pay more attention to what's her name...ah...Lori...I know I'm close. 2013: I will try for reconciliation with Lo. 2014: I will try to be more attentive to Carol. Resolution Two 2011: I will walk 35,000 steps a day this year. 2012: I will definitely start my walking routine this year at 10,000 steps a day. 2013: I will walk once a week. 2014: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week. Resolution Three 2008: I will not stare at women's cleavage . 2009: I will cut down the amount of time I stare at women's cleavage. 2010: I will stop being so obvious when I stare at women's cleavage. 2011: I will attempt to stop getting caught staring at women's cleavage. 2012: I will stop increasing the time I spend staring at women's cleavage. 2013: I will seek professional help as directed by the courts. 2014: I will try to stop starring at the female prison guards cleavage. Resolution Four 2011: I will not let my siblings push me around. 2012: I will stick up for myself with at least one of my siblings. 2013: I will not let my siblings bullying depress me. 2014: I will talk to Dr. Potter and the group about my siblings. Resolution Five 2008: I will read Clarissa this year all 1534 pages. 2009: I did not read Clarissa I will read Varney The Vampire all 866 pages. 2010: I will read the first 50 pages of Varney The Vampire this year. 2011: I will read some articles in the newspaper this year. 2012: I will try and finish the comics section this year. 2013: I will read one strip in the cartoon section this year. 2014: I will read the fortune cookie thingy the next time I have Chinese Food. 18~12~2014 Sponsor: Regina Riddle Contest Name: New Year's Resolution