My Most Sincere Apology(I Wish God Would Have Taken Me Instead of You)

I'm breaking down again. My patience has worn thin. I can't promise you anything. It kills me that I can no longer do anything for you. I'm watching you descend. You're so broken. I'm sorry for letting you down. I just wish I could replace some of the mistakes that I have made. I want to give you the devotion I believe you deserved. I wish I could show you your worth. I bury my face in my hands. This isn't how I had it all planned out. But now I'm helpless in all of this and I feel like I have betrayed you. God I hate myself for allowing you to fall face first. I wish I could have done so much more. I just wish God would grant me another chance. One more opportunity. I pray for clarity. I don't understand the meaning in this tragedy. I feel you slipping away in a dream that I can't escape. I have made so many mistakes. You're blameless. I can't take this. I feel the tears fall. I wish God would have taken me instead of you. If I could I'd give you my all just to bring you back. But you're slipping through the cracks. As much as I try there's absolutely nothing I can do. I'm sorry. I wish I could look deep into your eyes and apoligize . I'm sorry. IF I could I'd give my life just to see you live another day.