My Mental Health In Critical Condition

My head spinning ... on these white walls ... My mental health in critical condition ... trying to remember who I am why I am here Trying to escape from this mental hospital .Doctors asking me my name... I can't answer them.....Hearing voices in my head, Seeing Shadows everywhere telling me to stop ... Running ... I can't, it's too late !!! ... the pain in my soul , already pierce my bones.  I got lost in the dark ..  I Take the wrong way..  I lost faith and hope.  My soul seems to be a the wrong person's body I'm in the SECLUSION ROOM Tied from my hands and feet i don't understand why I feel a shame , and hopeless Trying with all my heart and soul..to get up But I can't im mentality drained and fiscally my body is letting go ... My memories fading far away ... This place is  destroying the person that  I was .. My face is reflected in the mirror ...  My voice with so much sadness and fear to say anything .. I look at myself again in the mirror don't know that person is a stranger to me.. I look at myself in the mirror again and I only look at the damage that I cause myself all the bad choices . Tiers running down my face getting so Emotional looking around me seeing Myself in there with all the patients that have been traumatized and torched by the system. ,  God forgive me if I wish my death ..  God forgive me for trying against my life ..   The pain overcomes ...im not strong anymore I don't  know who I am I don't know who is the person in the mirror. .. I want to be seduce under the effect of the analgesia. So the memories and pain fade into oblivion and ... Loneliness ARILENE H..