My Life Isn't, Exactly

My life isn't exactly what I'd have wished for, had I roused myself to wish. I might have lived a life filled full, puffed with particularity, and limited: boundaried by Plymouths, VA loans, and bills from Dr. Bill. I might then have shaped my mind to fit a space, quite small, where largest loomed my daily cares. I should then have been content to hear the patter of small feet upon cement of terrace, porch, basement or garage, and to emit, upon request, a well-designed barrage of timely chatter, to complement the patter, to pace the ticking of the clock. But no...I cannot to such rhythms and designs become resigned... must play the nomad (and the bard) till play and I be ended, low or high, and must try to know, and yet not know, the great vague How, the What, the Why...