Home » Poems » Matthew Bailey » My Dear, in Headlights

My Dear, in Headlights

No one dead is reaching out to you 
That's my voice that you hear when you're remembering all the opportunities you let go 
This is the lonely road 
and not only are you driving it but I watched you pave the way with a thousand different layers 
Quick, fashion a zipper mechanism of your lips 
And wear it like a jacket
It's getting chilly 
and there's nothing you could say to make this up to me anyways
Quick, fashion a prosthetic to better lend a hand
To save this semi-constructed mind that can't afford to expand 
Your subconscious expectations are the real blade to my throat 
And I'm not even shaving 
Silence your phone and turn into a pumpkin
But you're not even carving 
A well full of sustenance but the rope is splitting 
Such attention seeking wrists
But you're not even carving anymore 
No one truly knows who I’m picturing in my bed 
So please,
Tell me about the one you chose to love instead 
In the garden of Eden,
Paradise would’ve disgraced you
Toxic flowers would have cursed you with a mouth full of soil 
And withering virtues 
There’s nothing you could say that would make me forgive you anyways 
Like twirling bodies on ice rinks,
Everybody watches you and wonders how you keep your balance 
One mother bird to teach all the others to how to make a nest,
One match to light the candle that lights all the rest 
One second too late, 
you can’t block my number cause I already discarded yours as a counterprotest 
And you’ve been looking for a savior to put your self-growth to the test 
A broken escalator is still steps in the right direction
But you might have to isolate the wound to counter this infection 
I’m just another connection-seeking fool 
Who wants to see our initials engraved in trees
But neither of us are even carving 
A master at biting off more than I can chew and still ending up starving 
No one could ever know the first thing I think about when I get out of bed 
So please, put her face on a flag 
And tell me about the one you chose to love instead 
Like father, like son
Like mother nature, like daughter
Unlike the doves you forced to fly me to the furthest abattoir,
I can see the apple that fell off the branch 
It’s not that far 
Like the future you feel is a lifetime away
Can’t write me a poem for machinations sake
Couldn’t comfort me when I was right around the corner
But you’ll say goodnight to the stars, a million miles away 
One wish, sacrificed for better luck
One theory that deems you a drug, since I’m looking for a rush
What turned into a colossal uncovering from a nanoscopic crush, 
Has me tumbling like a weed and rummaging through the brush 
Of your garden of Eden you’ve planted inside my head
And I could be playing the patient, but I’m reaping what you sowed instead

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