Murder She Wrote

It’s hard for me to take My own advice I’m writing what I’m fighting But I’m still playing With my life I don’t even understand The issues of my own brain I go from addiction to affliction But I married my pain I find myself in consistent miscommunication Simple minded people Believe it’s the only form of communication Passive aggressive They breed confusing situations Then when it comes to confrontation They admit no responsibility for The feelings of hostility and aggravation I have already run the out of Patience I’m ready to put myself into solitary isolation Me myself and I Is the only consolation In the face of the nonsense I’m constantly facing This anxiety still has my mind racing Adrenaline in my bloodstream Has my senses on heightened elevations Eyes wide open And a mind perceiving Shocking Revelations... Is there anyone capable Of really loving me? When push comes to shove Why is it the ones closest to me That are shoving me? And it’s usually in the direction of the door I remember all the places I’ve been thrown away in And that I can’t go back to anymore So I stay ready for War Post traumatically traumatized Means I’m not the same me anymore I have a disorder That seems to puts my perspective In a different order I see sabotage and problems And a pervasive sense of chaos And disorder So I’m never really at ease A mind like mine keeps me on the Battle Lines So it’s hard for me to find any Peace I see relationships I used to be in Spiraling away Like fallen leaves I know why hearts are always drawn with wings Because love flies away and leaves And when it’s gone the feelings That were once the feelings of love Turn into a sickness Like it’s become a disease Bring me to my knees... Take the blade from out of my back And draw it across my throat She said she loved me But it was really murder she wrote.