mother

You tell me to study, To focus, to learn, Yet you don’t seem to care, Content with a 50 percent you tell me to study so that i can be independent To avoid a future of dependence, To escape the fate you endured, For a moment, I could believe You only wanted me to suceed Who else would be so concerned, If not my own mother? But you don't know Your daughter is a lost cause, Not someone to pin hopes on, An empty vase, Devoid of blooming flowers Your eyes, filled with guilt and disgust, They make me want to kill— Kill every dream that i ever dreamed The true dreams, for ME When I see your eyes filled with guilt and disgust, for all the nights you spent blaming yourself how shall i repay? for all the tears you shed for me what have i become? I want to dig a hole inside these walls, run away to places far way, for i have disappointed you enough, for me being there or not dosent make a difference These walls of my room, The room where I’ve spent half of my life. Maybe one day you’ll realize, somewhere beneath these walls, Lies the real me. that day, the same tears will fall, But they shall reflect on a different me— in those hopeful eyes i want to see the real me, a new me a better me.