Kathleen Hassall | + Follow Poet |
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Morning Mourning

The moment that I awaken is the hardest moment of the day
when, my mind starts to come alive with the promise of a new day
then, ………I remember and the pain of the last two weeks crashes in
and the reality of my grief is renewed

My son is absent from this earth and I have to figure out how to live
my life without the presence of my beautiful young man
I grieve for the world, because he was a special person
I grieve for my family, because he was an integral part
and I grieve for my myself because he was my son and there
really are no words to describe the gaping hole in my heart and life

How does one move forward when life explodes and takes someone 
that is so very important?

There is no easy answer to that and I am still trying to figure out
how TO LIVE.  For the moment, I am resting in the arms of those
that reach out to help and support me in ways I am not yet able 
dinner and a hug came on a very hard day last week.  Comfort.  Love.

Putting one foot in front of the other.  Re-learning how to regulate 
emotions that can take control and overwhelm me at any moment
letting my mind try to find the words to describe this catastrophic loss
resting in the arms of God where I can find hope I am not yet ready to embrace

I will find a way to move on, but I won’t figure that out alone.  My tribe has
closed the ranks and are protecting me, feeding me, checking in on me,
and literally holding me through the storm that begins each day 
in the morning as I remember that there is a gaping hole in my life

Copyright © Kathleen Hassall | Year Posted 2025

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Line Gauthier Date: 8/18/2025 8:46:00 PM As I started reading your poem, I pictured your son glowing, smiling, sitting across from you, wishing you a Good Morning as you were waking up ~ showing you he really is "safe and healed" now. Login to Reply Kathleen Hassall Date: 8/24/2025 5:41:00 PM That is how I picture him now! Thank you, Line!

Kim Rodrigues Date: 6/1/2025 5:15:00 AM I’m glad you have such friends and don’t fear to let them know what you need including space on some day. I hope I don’t say too much. I don’t know you personally but I do care deeply. ((hugs)) Login to Reply Kathleen Hassall Date: 6/2/2025 6:01:00 PM Thank you, Kim. I do appreciate that. I am shattered and I am surprised that I can write about it. It does help.