Ink Empress | + Follow Poet |
Tetractys | + Fav Poem | Comment | Email | Print |

metaphors of regret

I
dreamt of
a poem
forgot the words
As beneath the salty cold brine of tears
silence floats, whilst I’m coloring kohl rain
in metaphors
of regret
across
blood
red
ruby 
carnations
that bleed silken
sonnets for an ocean-dipped catharsis

Please Login to post a comment

Hilo Poet Date: 12/17/2023 10:31:00 PM Well, there's a boatload of regret there. I almost forgot how I trend sometimes, and before you know it, that darn quill will make time disappear, like today. Anyhow, your Tetractys Form kinda looks like a ship's anchor. Cheers, my friend. Aloha, William Login to Reply

Paige Hind Date: 12/16/2023 11:46:00 AM I loved the whole piece. All the lines haunted me, I loved how you started it... Login to Reply

Silent One Date: 12/14/2023 1:04:00 PM This has happened to me so many times.. dreaming of a poem then forgetting it when I wake up.. sometimes i think a poem is great whilst im dreaming and when i wake it does not sound too good... you do this form very well dear poet. Login to Reply

Vijay Pandit Date: 12/14/2023 6:34:00 AM Succinct yet highly descriptive--I hear forlorn emotions of regret. The ending line adds brilliant emphasis. Login to Reply

Hiya Sharma Date: 12/13/2023 9:32:00 PM Oh my, this is such a heartfelt and poignant tetractys with such delicate hues of ache and angst reflecting so evocatively.Sometimes, emotions make us feel numb and whilst our quills yearn to bleed, our words seem lost in the wildfires of confusion and pain.We sequin our feelings with metaphors that dive in the onyx agony that we breathe, as we wish for "an ocean dipped catharsis"Ahh,my dear Ink, your adjectives, imageries, metaphors and unique way of conveying emotions truly make you an Empress Login to Reply Ink Empress Date: 12/13/2023 9:56:00 PM Awwn thank you sweet angelic star you are truly the best, you always feel my poems so very well im forever grateful for your kind and generous support Hiya Sharma Date: 12/13/2023 9:42:00 PM "silence floats, whilst I’m coloring kohl rain", "across blood red ruby carnations that bleed silken sonnets for an ocean-dipped catharsis" The flow of words here is absolutely impeccable my dear, your writes stand above as Favorites for me always, cuz well we adoreee adjectives and metaphors, keep writing :)

Valsa George Date: 12/13/2023 8:19:00 PM You are equally proficient in writing long poems and poems of brevity. This is sharp as a razor blade and beautiful as 'blood red ruby carnations.' I love carnations of all shades. Love the punch the expression gives--"that bleed silken sonnets for an ocean-dipped catharsis"--When you attempt to write a poem, do you forget the words? May be very rare. In my case, it happens so often. Wonderful lay out too.... Login to Reply Ink Empress Date: 12/13/2023 9:54:00 PM Dear valsa you are like a poetic angel, seriously. So sweet and kind. I appreciate you so very much. Truly for all your support for my long and short poems both. I hope you’ll always remember how grateful i am for you

Paula Goldsmith Date: 12/13/2023 6:54:00 PM A wonderful/creative write. I enjoyed this one.  Have a blessed day writing away.......... Login to Reply

Charlotte Puddifoot Date: 12/13/2023 1:35:00 PM i think this form really suits your writing, as the brevity of it forces you to pull back a bit on the adjectives..i especially like the ending.."silken sonnets..ocean-dipped catharsis" Login to Reply Ink Empress Date: 12/13/2023 9:51:00 PM Dear charlotte, yes it helps wordy writers to be more disciplined and concise, when using strict forms. But i think i have a problem. I find poems with less descriptive words hard to comprehend or rather complex. My brain is wired in such a way that adjectives help me feel more. And i tend to do it too. Sometimes i read poems with very few adjectives ten times, and still not understand a word. Although they are beautiful and poetic. I need to do some research on this condition. Thank you always for your support means alot coming from you, a talented poet and writer

Sotto Poet Date: 12/13/2023 12:07:00 PM What a gorgeously composed and extremely well-crafted poem! Regrets gracefully and capriciously permeate the atmosphere, as if anticipating a flood of profound revelation to overpower them. Celestial beings traverse at extraordinary velocities, conveying significant messages, effortlessly surmounting the most formidable challenges posed by precipitation, and triumphing over human uncertainty, suffering, and anguish, akin to a conduit of profound understanding. Login to Reply

I Am Anaya Date: 12/13/2023 11:46:00 AM I have done the same! Unique form, perfect for your theme of forgetting a poem in dream state. I just revised an older poem about the same subject 'dream'. Way to go, Ink. Blessings ~Anaya Login to Reply

Regina Mcintosh Date: 12/13/2023 11:15:00 AM Wonderful write. love this. God bless you always. love, Gina Login to Reply

Joe Maverick Date: 12/13/2023 10:54:00 AM Regrets swirled in whimsy, needing a wave of Tidal clarity, that may emerge.? Through A conduit of coizence, roaring steeds of Cosmic speed, with tales to share, flowing passing The darkest walls of rain, trancending human Doubt angst and pain. Login to Reply

The Aura Rhymes Date: 12/13/2023 9:53:00 AM Wow ! Just wow ! Login to Reply

Lioness Onpaper Date: 12/13/2023 9:39:00 AM dreamt of a poem forgot the words.. me tooo hahahhagahahah!!! … As beneath the salty cold brine of tears.. aaaah cold brine tears !!! Our body’s natural exfoliation!!!! XD .. coloring kohl rain in metaphors of regret across blood red ruby carnations.. ooooo that line … just freaking gorgeous!!! silken sonnets for an ocean-dipped catharsis.. … mmmmmm!!! Papi … very bueno that ending aee!!! Login to Reply

Tom Woody Date: 12/13/2023 9:30:00 AM So kewl Inkster! Nothing worse for a poet than to get inspired then forget the words or lose interest Login to Reply Ink Empress Date: 12/13/2023 9:31:00 AM Yes, ugh i always dream lines and forget … sad story; thank you tomster